Amazing Race
Amazing Race

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B+ | 572 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Shut up and Singapore

JVJ is sure trying. They hop out of their cab outside the station and run in. Before you know it, there are FloZach and the Bald Snark, and there are the twins. An unhappy Ian observes these arrivals with dismay. He runs into Flo (boy, there's a truckload of obnoxious all on the screen at the same time), who fills him in that, indeed, all the teams are there. Ian takes the news back to Teri, who is no happier than Ian is. "The race is on," Flo says cheerfully, with that never-say-die attitude for which she is known. Back in The Asshat Pouting Corner, Ian says, "So much for being lucky." Aww. Poor Ian. In an interview, Zach says that he was shocked to see Asshat at the train station, but he was at least happy that they weren't out in front. Flo reports to Jill about Ian's inquiry about whether the teams are there, giving it a snotty spin that sounds completely different from the reasonably polite way in which Ian asked the question. Sometimes, I think she just forgets there are cameras there. Everyone buys train tickets, and everyone is on the 11:15 to Singapore. Zach takes note of, and takes comfort in, the bunching.

Train to Singapore. Gerard says through a mouthful of lunch that he and Ken are "going to kick some butt on this leg," and they're "not being eliminated this round." This, of course, forces me to stand up, turn around in a circle, and spit to try to break the whammy that Gerard just placed on his team. Foolish Gerard. Fate-tempter. First he names his team, then he gets the monogrammed hat...is there no end to the foolishness? Drew, meanwhile, says that their strategy is to stick with the pack and then "beat everyone in a sprint to the finish."

Oh, goody. More "flirting." Flo and Drew are playing cards on the train. Believe it or not, she voices over that he's "nice" yet again. There is voice-over yapping about the really big lurve. Bad timing, conflicts of interest, gingham sleeveless curtain shirt. "It's a tough game," he anvils. "I want you to be challenged," she falling-pianos. BOOM! CRASH! Wow, gravity is a bitch.

Everyone disembarks at the Singapore station, with poor Flo and Drew tossing tragic little "un-train my heart" glances at each other. Worst development? Ian found the Hat. Ew. Inside the station, Drew discusses the fact that the orchid gardens don't open until the next morning, and apparently the train trip took most of the rest of the day, so they need a place to sleep for the night. JVJ and the Bald Snark look for cabs outside and ask the drivers about hotels, while FloZach and the twins stay inside and try to figure out where to stay. Zach suggests the YMCA to Drew, which Flo overhears. She is not going to the YMCA, she pouts. You can see, among other things, that Derek grins at Zach as Flo starts to lose it, which is yet another thing she ought to take as a bad sign. She's becoming an object of sympathy between the various people who have to deal with her on the race, and that tends to suggest that there's something wrong. She says in an interview that she hadn't slept or showered in two days, so obviously, she needed someplace nicer than the YMCA. Not that she's been there or knows what the rooms are like. I'd point out that at least one other person was snoozing on the train while she was getting her Jessica Wakefield on with Drew, so if she were that desperate for sleep, it's not like there weren't opportunities. She bitches to Zach about how he shouldn't give her a hard time, because he knows that the quality of the hotel is important to her. The problem with this theory, of course, is that everything is important to her. Train versus taxi is important to her. Hotel versus other hotel is important to her. Not rappelling is important to her. Not bungee-jumping is important to her. She's partly got a girl-who-whined-wolf problem here, in that she plays this card constantly. She does this Quest For Pity thing a lot, and that's part of my whole objection to her. If it were just the hotels, he probably would be bending by now, but he can't, because she's this way about everything.

Amazing Race

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