Amazing Race
Why Did You Have To Take Your Pants Off?!, Part II

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Miss Alli: B | Grade It Now!
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Shut up and Singapore

Elsewhere, Teri and Ian wander. Ian asks whether the airport is near the "fountain of youth." Heh. Paging Dr. Freud. Teri equivocates. "I guess," she says again. "Your guess is as good as mine," he puts in. "You're driving," she retorts. They're just such a joy.

Jill and John Vito are driving around, looking for the fountain. He voices over about how they're having trouble finding their way to the main highway. Asshat, meanwhile, pulls up next to a guy on a bike and asks if he'll lead them to the fountain. He agrees. When they get there, Ian says to Teri, "Windows up, please." Teri: "Don't yell at me!" Actually, he didn't yell at her. He treated her like a child, which certainly is not desirable, but he didn't yell at her. I suppose she's so used to being yelled at that she barely hears him anymore. As they run across the road, he says, "Sorry I was short with you, it's just that winning drive that I have." Man, I hate that so much. It's the non-apology apology. It's officially, technically an apology, but by making it clear that the only reason he did it was his "winning drive," he makes clear that he isn't really wrong, he's just misunderstood. He and Flo really are sort of soulmates in that respect, if you think about it. Anyway, at the fountain, he runs in for the clue. He and Teri leave just as John Vito and Jill pull in. John Vito grabs the clue, and they take off too.

Derek and Drew find their way to Mount Faber. They park the car and run for the mat. Welcome, Derek and Drew, you are team number one. "Woooo!" Phil presents them with a seven-day cruise in Europe. Man, they have won quite a number of legs. They'd have digital cameras coming out of their picturesque ears by now if there weren't an evident one-camera limit.

Ken and Gerard and FloZach are approaching the pit stop. Once again, someone with a finger on the button who doesn't like Flo very much plays a voice-over of her saying, "Ken and Gerard, I kick their ass in a footrace." Then both teams pull up, and both teams pile out of their cars, and both teams head for the mat. And Zach is out in front of Kenny and Gerard, and they pretty much can't keep up with him. Who's bringing up the rear? Flo. Flo, who is most certainly not in the process of kicking anyone's ass in a footrace. Oh, look, she's dragging way behind. Welcome Ken and Gerard, you are team number two. But there's no "YAAY!" this week, because Gerard turns to shake Phil's hand, and Kenny looks too tired for "YAAY!" They voice over that their strategy is just to stay alive. Welcome FloZach, you are team number three. Flo interviews that "when it comes down to it, [they] make a great, great team." Whatever you say, Screechy.

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Amazing Race

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