Chip and Reichen are floating and searching as well. They seem to be following Kelly and Jon, who are following Chuck and Millie, which I guess makes Millie the blonde leading the bland. And Kelly the chaser chasing the chaste. I have such a headache. In another part of the river, Al thinks he is actually understanding where he and ClownJon are. The clowns note that the other teams all went the opposite direction, which they find baffling, because it seems to them you would start out by actually figuring out where you're going. Silly clowns. Monica and Sheree are just taking off from the dock, and they find the whole boat-driving thing not entirely to their liking. When Tian and Jaree arrive at the dock, they're pretty flummoxed as well. In the boat, Jaree offers to drive so that Tian can look, but Tian just says she's fine, and acts like she knows where they're going. In an interview, Jaree says that Tian doesn't listen to her, but always just does what she wants to do. True, it would appear.
Up at the front of the Wrong-Way Riders, Chuck, who is looking at the map, says he's going to make a right. "No, no, no, no, no," Millie scolds like she's his mom. "Don't make a move until we know we're going the right way." Wait a minute, is that not exactly what he said when they were at the dock? Is that not when she acted like the dock was about to blow up and it was essential that they get away from it as soon as possible? She starts whining about how they're going to lose the pack of people and get behind and blah blah blah, and he asks her to please help him look for signs instead of wasting her energy bitching. Of course, he does not say "bitching." He says "doing that." And what is "that"? BITCHING. I just don't get it at all. He's wrong when he waits and tries to figure it out. He's wrong when he keeps going in the hopes that it will work out. What, exactly, could he have done that would have been right, besides obey?
Kelly and Jon are having a disagreement as well, because he's frustrated that she isn't doing a good job of following Millie and Chuck, while she thinks following people who look lost isn't a particularly great plan. "They're idiots. They don't know where they're going, I'm telling you," she says. Millie and Chuck, up ahead, note Kelly and Jon and the Chipsters both behind them. It appears that the first people to figure out that this entire gaggle of goofballs is going the wrong direction are Chip and Reichen. "We gotta turn around," Reichen says, so they do.
Who has successfully found the way to the museum first? The clowns. And why? Because they figured out where they were going instead of following somebody else or randomly driving off down a mystery canal and hoping for the best. They de-boat and hustle up on the dock in front of the museum, which is where the clue box is. The clue explains this week's Detour. The choices this week? Well, the choices are entitled "500 Kilograms" and "15 Feet." As Phil explains, the first choice is 500 Kilograms, in which the team will drive thirty miles to an outdoor market, put on wooden shoes, and use a stretcher to carry cheese from a pile to a scale. They have to get exactly 500 kilograms of cheese on the scale to finish the task. Cheese is heavy, and the task is far away, so why would you choose that task? Well, because your other choice is "15 Feet," in which you go to a ranch that's only about half as far away, and you search for a clue. In a fifteen-foot pile of cow manure. Basically, your fear of death in a traditional Reckless/Chicken detour has been replaced by your fear of poo. Which is, for many people, equally paralyzing. Phil, in describing "15 Feet": "Teams are likely to wind up filthy, and smelling...pretty bad." It's hard to appreciate what a great line that was unless you can hear it in Phil's accent, and the way he says it with the dramatic pauses, just like he does when he threatens you with smearing your entrails down the side of a mountain.