The teams are so spread out we don't even get departure times from the Pit Stop, not that it matters with all of the reversals in this episode. In a second Moscow-based leg, Nick and Starr get their lead back and effortlessly win their sixth leg of the race. But they're the only ones who don't run into trouble. Ken and Tina aren't getting along so great this week, and messing up on the Detour doesn't help. Dan and Andrew have problems with the Road Block, although they have decent luck on their Speed Bump. But all of this pales compared to what Toni and Dallas face after losing their Amazing Purse with all of their money and passports. The Frat Boys actually end up pulling out their first second-place finish. Ken and Tina follow them to the mat, but have to go back due to having missed a clue along the way. But the time they've lost isn't enough to allow Toni and Dallas to catch up, and Phil has to go and find them on the streets of Moscow to eliminate them. They never even make it to the mat. Ouch-ski.
So there's your final three: Ken and Tina, the Siblings, and -- who could have thought it possible? -- the Frat Boys. I'd hazard a prediction for the finish next week, but the very fact that Dan and Andrew are even still in it tells you all you need to know about my powers of prognostication.
We're still in Moscow, which Phil describes as "the largest, most populated city in Europe." That surprises me a bit, although I knew it was in the top five. Meanwhile, London, Paris, and Rome kick angrily at the dirt. Neskuchny Sad Park is still the ninth Pit Stop, in case you were concerned that they moved it to Red Square or something since last week. Phil asks us whether Andrew and Dan, the Frat Boys who came in last at the end of the previous leg and yet were spared by the grace of a non-elimination leg, will "be able to overcome a Speed Bump and avoid elimination." "Absolutely, Phil," Dan responded on the mat. We weren't talking to you.
Since Toni and Dallas won the last leg, they are going to be the first to leave the Pit Stop. The departure times are conspicuously absent this week, but I can tell you that they're leaving in daylight and it's going to remain daylight throughout the entire leg, whatever Ken may say later. Their first task is to take a cab to a retired nuclear submarine that's docked at a park somewhere in the city. Presumably in a river or a reservoir or something. Inside the submarine's sonar room is the person who will give them their next clue, "an actor who appeared in the movie The Hunt for Red October." No, it's not Sean Connery, but he looks pretty official in his naval uniform, especially when he holds out an Amazing Yellow Envelope for the camera. In their pre-departure interview, Dallas says he's pretty confident about making it into the final three. Since all other scenarios require Andrew and Dan to be in the final three, I'm with him on that. Barring some spectacular blunder on his part, of course. As he prompts his mom into a jog through the sprawling park, we see Toni interview that Dallas has always wanted to make his own decisions since an early age, and she wants him to find happiness. But before he can do that, though, they need to find a cab, and at the first one they flag down, Dallas doodles a little submarine on his "Route Info" slip. "I understand," the cabbie says in subtitled Russian. The universal language of Pictionary.
Ken and Tina are leaving in second place, and judging from the way she nudges him as she reads the clue aloud, he must be a big Hunt for Red October fan. They hail a taxi, and Tina scolds him for not being aggressive enough. She interviews that they've had ups and downs. As she tries to make herself understood to the driver by the American method of speaking English LOUDLY, Ken tells her not to yell, and her interview goes on to add that she doesn't think Ken prioritizes their relationship enough. As they get moving, the driver is punching numbers into a GPS unit on his dash (nice!) while Tina attempts to produce her own submarine doodle. "That is a bad submarine right there," Ken says unhelpfully, but when she holds it out for the driver, he reassures her in subtitled Russian, "We'll find it." Tina thinks her hieroglyphic made the difference. But be warned, readers: Ken's in some kind of mood today. Just wait and see.