Amazing Race
You're Gonna Get Me Killed

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M. Giant: A | 1 USERS: A+
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Knocked Out of the Park

Dallas and Toni approach a couple of locals for help, claiming their passports and money were "stolen." Good line. I'm trying not to be judgmental about it.

Andrew and Dan have progressed from lurching randomly to cavorting randomly, which is some form of progress.

And Toni and Dallas receive a bit of cash. In a tearful interview, Toni talks about the two Russian men who handed over all the cash they had on them. Then the two men point them onto a bus, which Toni and Dallas board. They sit in their seats looking like they're on their way to a funeral. Their own, possibly.

Ken and Tina are getting on a bus, but that's no trolley bus. They briefly wonder if the absence of wires is relevant, but when they hear that the bus is going where they want to go, that's all they need to hear.

Dan and Andrew finish the dance. Unsurprisingly, the instructor didn't love it, and tells them to do it again. Meanwhile, Nick and Starr get off their train, planning to search next for the "Kryllics." And Ken and Tina learn from a local that they're on the wrong kind of bus.

Meanwhile, Nick and Starr find their babushka and swap their samsa for the postcard sending them to VDNKh Park Station via the Metro. That right there goes onto the growing list of "sentences I never thought I'd write." This show is great for that list.

Ken and Tina get off the non-trolley bus at the same time as their helpful local, who points out what a trolley bus is. There goes one now, in fact. They decide to taxi back to their starting point rather than take their chances with another bus. "We're getting ourselves in deep trouble," Ken laments in the cab while Tina fiddles with her eye makeup. Some more.

Andrew and Dan are finally performing the folk dance with, if not skill, at least enjoyment and gusto and a fair degree of commitment. Which counts for a lot, if you ask me. The instructor agrees with me, and hands them their clue so they can get back in it. Back to the Shetland pony lady, and they decide to take the bus option. "Trolley boose!" Dan yells at no one. Thank God -- I was almost starting to like them.

Way, way back at the Bulgakov apartment to which they've just returned, Toni and Dallas hail a cab with the 400 rubles they've begged and secure a ride back to Sokol'niky park. "We're just gonna take this one step at a time now," Toni says. Which is wise, because if I extend the metaphor, their shoes might as well be made out of Lenin statues.

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Amazing Race

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