Anna says she "has a big butt in this dress." Just that dress?
Anna watches the news. What, isn't The Osbournes on? Howard asks how many bad stories in a row they're telling. "Is that four bad or five bad?" Shut up, Howard. This isn't Sesame Street. Thank god. Anna says, "Why do they even show the news? You know those bumper stickers that say, 'Shit happens and then you die'? They should say, 'Shit happens and then you live,' 'cause that's the truth of it." Gongggg. I can see clearly now. There shall be nooooo obstacles in my waaay.
Anna weaves around the suite (again, some more), then heads to the limo. Once inside, she car-dances to what I believe is the theme to Austin Powers. "Noo-noo-noo-noo! Noo-noo-noo-noo!" She dances away. Howard says she can do that all the way down the red carpet. Shut up, Howard. Then Anna says she likes "supah-staah!" She sniffs her fingers. Oh, boy.
Still in the limo, Anna asks, "Who's killing the Jews?" Hey, who isn't? Howard goes into Sesame Street mode and explains that people are "strapping bombs onto their bodies into Israel and blowing themselves up in, like, coffee shops." Anna looks like she smells something bad. "Isn't that kinda painful?" Kinda. Howard, pushing like any lawyer, says he thinks Anna "should speak out in support of Israel." Now Anna looks like Howard smells bad. Kim says it looks like Anna is "gonna stay neutral." Anna rolls her eyes side to side and says she's "just gonna shuut uup! I know nothing about nothing. Oh, yes. Oh, yes." Oh, yes. Even though this is a beautiful statement, I think my brain is broken. I mean, why can't everyone admit they know nothing, and that they're going to shut up? And everyone would just be as naahce as pah! There would nivah be any wa-ruh! Then Ah could bah the wo-ruld a Coke. Help me, please.
Anna poses on the red carpet for tons of photographers. They all scream her name, and she poses prettily. She says that Guess? was her first campaign and she loved it, and she "misses it." The party is kind of a fetish party; there are body-painted nearly nude girls, and lots of bondage gear and riding crops on the runway. Anna admits that she "couldn't wear those clothes." Not with that attitude! Anna signs autographs for many men. Howard asks if she wants to go to a restaurant. She says she wants to "have an orgy. [She hasn't] had sex in two years!" Kim rolls her eyes and sighs audibly. What?
Once they get back to the hotel room, Sugar Pie runs around excitedly. Anna chases Sugar Pie, crawls under a coffee table, and gets stuck. Her giant bum causes her to be trapped. I never thought I'd write that sentence.