Apprentice: Martha
Apprentice: Martha

Episode Report Card
Joe R: C+ | 486 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Up Your Nose with a Retractable Hose

The teams board their respective busses to QVC headquarters in Pennsylvania. Dawna interviews about how sad she was to leave Matchstick, what with the camaraderie and the winning and the no Jim or Bethenny. Jim announces that this isn't a hard task, but project manager Bethenny interviews that if she makes the wrong choice of on-air salesperson, they could definitely lose. She, Dawna, and Howie do some laptop research on QVC, and when they read about the network's preference not to go for the hard sell, Bethenny shows some self-awareness and says Dawna would be the best on-air candidate. Additionally, the team decides Howie is a more appealing salesman than Jim (you think? My bunions soaking in Asian vinaigrette tend to disagree), so Dawna and Howie it is. We didn't see it, but it's pretty obvious that the decision had been made early on to go with one male and one female on-air. Then: Jim acting like a moron. As Dawna comments that her new team has "a little bit more energy," we get shots of Jim doing…something with a can of pop, Jim dancing in the limo so the cameras don't accidentally stop filming him for a second, and Jim, to the best of my horrified observation, miming fellatio. I'd tell you more, but my eyes are now welded shut for-ever. Dawna seems to have miraculously retained her powers of observation, as she interviews about how every three minutes, Jim does something that makes her cringe. Every three minutes? Can I be Dawna for today? Back in the limo, Jim is talking about some "fat bastard that [sic] eats like a pig," and Bethenny tells him to "reel it in." She interviews that if she tells Jim to simmer, he'll simmer, because she knows how to manage him. Okay, well, where were you at the grocery store, lady? She goes on to say that she doesn't think Dawna can function unless it's "quiet and controlled," and it's here that you notice that both Jim and Bethenny pronounce Dawna's name like "Donna." And, hey, I've got the Great Lakes flat vowel thing rocking hard, so I shouldn't be throwing regional accent stones, but even I can manage that distinction. Plus, I don't recall either of them calling Dawn "Don," so the whole thing puzzles me.

Apprentice: Martha

Comments

SHARE THE SNARK

X

Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP