Apprentice: Martha
Apprentice: Martha

Episode Report Card
Keckler: B- | 650 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
It's Quite Easy Being Green

In the loft, Hateful Jim tells Primarius that it got ugly in the conference room, and he predicts that Leslie will be back and Dawn gone. Marcela bitches about how terribly her team has been doing and that it made her feel so bad, she wanted to go home. Leslie and Bethenny return. Leslie's face breaks into a broad smile as people in the loft cheer, but Bethenny keeps her baked bitchface on. It sort of makes me respect her more. I mean, after that hug she and Dawn shared last week, maybe she doesn't feel like exulting and celebrating her ousting. Suddenly, the Martha phone begins to ring and everyone gets worried. It's Julia to tell them that everyone has to return to the conference room. "What happened? What's going on?" Hateful Jim calls out as he's making sure to quickly change clothes. Various people bellow, "Conference room! Now!" "She said now!" "Now!" "We're going now!" Wait, when do they have to go? Hateful Jim joins them, saying, "Now I finally look like a Martha Stewart employee!" What? No, seriously, what? He's wearing a tight, stretchy tee-shirt and billowy white pants. How does he look like a Martha Stewart employee? I really don't get it. He chuckles at Leslie and bumps his hip against hers. "You do," she tells him. Again: How? Hateful Jim thanks her and then as she walks out of the frame, he draws his hand back. He walks behind a pillar and we hear a SMACK! I do believe he just slapped Leslie's General Hospital ass. I'm sure his wife loved watching that. Then again, given that she encouraged him not to be with her for the birth of their child, maybe she's beyond thrilled he's slapping another woman's ass.

Martha pretty much glares at them as they all sit down in the conference room. "I thought some of you'd be in their pajamas," she bites out, almost irritably. What is her problem? Everyone gives her an uncomfortable courtesy laugh. "I am," Hateful Jim says. So...pajamas are what MSLO employees wear to work? Why am I not getting this? I know I'm sick, but I didn't think it was making me stupid. Also, I really believe that when the Martha phone rang, Hateful Jim made a point of scurrying (scurrying like a RAT!) into his pajamas just so he could make a thing out of it. I mean, everyone else was assembled and actually waiting around for him before they went to the conference room; why did it take him so long to change if he wasn't changing back into proper clothes? More attention for Hateful Jim. More Wild Turkey in my veins. Martha tells them she called them back because she wants to reorganize the teams, "This is what we'd do at Martha Stewart Omnimedia. If a team wasn't working we would reshuffle, we would bring in different blood." Why does Alexis suddenly look so fearful at the sound of "blood"? Maybe she's afraid Mama's gettin' hungry.

Apprentice: Martha

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