Apprentice: Martha
Sweet Suite

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Flow it out your ass!

Matchstick. Leslie blathers something about weak teams having poor organizational strategy, so she proceeds to lead them through six hours of highly organized brainstorming of their vision. Both Dawn and Hateful Jim have confessionals about how much time they seemed to waste brainstorming.

Martha's Good Thing of the Week is: "How do you sell your idea?" Got that? Good, because I don't think it really applies this week.

Some of Primarius takes the van to a paint store to shop. I noticed that Ryan helps the women out of the van. Now, I'm not saying I need that kind of help, but I do think that sort of unconscious, unpretentious, casual chivalry is sort of nice. The interior designer that Ryan found helps Primarius pick out paint and wallpaper. Several times Carries tries to bring over printed wallpaper to accent some colors they already have, and Amanda just keeps shooting her down. Considering that one of her suggestions was wallpaper cheesily printed with rows of gold-stamped leather-bound books, and the other was so unrepentantly floral that it probably graces every single tea room in North Yorkshire, I don't really blame her. In irritation, Carrie makes that weird squashed nose-to-chin face again. Amanda shrugs in her confessional that she had to trust the professional and she couldn't worry over it being the wrong decision. Seriously, I don't think they're going to be judged so much on the color of the room as they will on what they do with the space. Unless, of course, the walls were totally black. Of course, in that case you could throw in tubs of black makeup, tack up some Cure posters, throw a pile of bones in the corner, and you've got yourself a Goth Suite! Look at me with all the ideas. At the paint store, Ryan expresses concern over the colors because it wasn't how he envisioned it. "But the one thing I've learned," Ryan confesses, "is never overestimate Matchstick. No matter how bad we do they're always going to find a way to do worse." Heh. It's funny cuz it's true.

Slow piano music plays as Matchstick continues to brainstorm. We actually see clock hands move as we hear various Matches drone, "Tranquility. Peace. Watching TV. Games." Dawn confesses that they were still brainstorming the concept when they should have been placing orders and getting other stuff done. Leslie continues to read off vision ideas. Internet David confesses that their hired contractors were sitting around all day because they didn't have any materials. We get lots of shots of bored contractors. "I like the idea of, like, flow. It's like Zen, it's like feng shui," Hateful Jim says. I don't have any idea what he's talking about, but Leslie must, because she says she likes it and orders Hateful Jim to come up with an acronym for FLOW. "Not right now," she adds. "FOR LEISURE OR WORK!" Hateful Jim stamps out. People cheer. Okay. But, isn't that exactly what a normal hotel room is for? I mean, usually, you're staying in one for leisure. Or for work. I don't see what is visionary about this idea. Maybe it's because I'm not a business type. Leslie attempts to explain it to me: "FLoW was the concept of balancing work and life. Having everything at your fingertips but also some fun things to inspire them and help them relax when they spend time in their room." Dawn confesses that it was stupid how much time they spent brainstorming. Seriously, six hours and they came up with "For Leisure or Work"?

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Apprentice: Martha

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