Apprentice
Apprentice

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A | 632 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Lesson Nine: You Can't Bulk-Sell Bullshit

Synergy rides their ferry to Ellis Island as Allie explains to us that three of her grandparents came here through there, so it's important to her, and maybe she can make her grandparents proud by winning this one. Only if one of her grandparents was Lizzie Borden, which I'm not ruling out. She finds a very friendly and knowledgeable park ranger guy who tells her interesting facts, which Tammy notes down in her Handy-Dandy Notebook for possible inclusion in the brochure. So far, so smart. For example, the process was around four-and-a-half to seven hours on a good day, but less fortunate immigrants could wait eight months to get through. Jeez. As we watch Allie pumping this guy for Ellis Island info, Andrea pulls Roxanne aside -- thinking they're going to be on the same side, even though she did this same shit to Roxanne twice as bad -- and tells her how they're "wasting time" because you could just pick up brochures for that kind of info. And there's a way in which she is right, but also: how very creative of you, lady. "Many brochures at Liberty National Park agree, Ellis Island is quite a trippy experience." Go do some fucking yoga. Roxanne interviews, of course, that Andrea is an asshole and a half, and that if she's not in charge, everybody is wrong. Also valid. "Her sole goal in life is to make the Project Manager's life a living hell." I would say that's one of her goals, another being complete control of her digestive system and the lives and souls of everyone in her vicinity, but that's a whole other deal.

Apprentice

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