Apprentice
Back To School

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Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now!
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Lesson Seven: If You Can't Say Anything Well…

Yeah. That. Back at the suite, Markus sits weirdly on the balcony smoking a cigar and writing down crazy thoughts about wine and who knows what else, while everyone else is packing and putting on makeup and whatever. Alla and Adam are in the bedroom, earning her the Palpatine references that have been made all week in the forums. She seizes on how Clay "went into subjects right away that weren't his to cover," which we might have known more about if we'd seen any kind of structure to the presentation, and she brings up the "slap on the ass" comment. I think there's some editorial gerrymandering going on here, because it's clear from what we do see, here and in the Boardroom, that she really wants somebody to bring up the gay stuff, and she really doesn't want to be the one to do it, so she's trying to get Adam there, but he's still stuck on the "tight-ass Jew" thing, for which I don't blame him. Well, except that he has an ample opportunity here to talk to Clay and at least fine-tune it and figure out that he needs to present it as an audience issue and not a personal attack issue. I'm also of the opinion that, while Clay was ambivalent with her last week and better this week, he's still ten times the endgame threat of Markus. (Which is to say, 10 x 0 is still 0, but who knows what could happen with Trump in charge.)

Alla gamely tries to lead Adam there for what must be at least the third time: "The goal here was to address the subject in a tasteful manner, without offending anybody." He's all, "With class, yeah." "But, getting the message across -- it's a very sensitive subject." I'd risk the opinion that her optimal plan is to crush the gay stuff and the Jewish stuff together for an unbeatable silver bullet of inappropriate, and Adam seems to get it: "He definitely offended some people in that room by making that comment about 'tight-ass Jew.' I saw eyes roll." Then we miss out on the brainwashing Alla does to get Adam obsessed with this (very true and correctly stated) point, and cut to the interview: "There's no question that his comment about me being a 'tight-ass Jew' skewed the votes. That is just not an appropriate comment to make." Just the sheer volume of times that Adam says this not precisely true statement puts me in mind of the whole Excel groupthink situation from earlier this season, like the "Green With Envy" talk-yourself-into-hype job. Alla opines that "Markus slows down the processes, he creates tension, but the fact of [it], when it comes down to it…" and Adam finishes it: "We lost because of our presentation."

Flash Quiz! Two trains going 185 kph and 236 kph are headed toward you from opposite directions. One of them freaks you out on a contact high resulting from his complete inability to verbalize or even think about sex in any way, to the degree that even hearing the word seems to hurt him physically. The other freaks you out due to his extreme and immature boundary-less ability to talk about sex in a very personal and evocative way, in an inappropriate forum.

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Apprentice

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