Apprentice
Apprentice

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: B | 663 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Lesson Twelve: Use Your Words

Setting up the Synergy environment, which is awful, Tammy realizes that the eyespace in Wal-Mart is 100\% composed of: signs, advertising, numbers, smiley faces, ugliness, kitty-cat sweatshirts, the bedazzled, thousands of dirty-faced screaming children, entire claustrophobic aisles about to fall on you, velour clothing by Kathy Ireland, people ramming you with their carts, people eating those ball-shaped puffy Cheetos out of cans, bare feet and those in flip-flops, stripper clothing for tweens, sweatpants and big combs and Jordache jeans, and always the signs -- and you have got to compete with that shit. Roxanne's banner shows up, the size of a postage stamp and with the design élan of generic governmental canned goods amidst this visual cacophony, and Tammy realizes: "Roxanne [can]not execute the signage." There's a cool juxtaposition between their difficulties attaching the stupid sign to their stupid tent, and the she said/she said of attacking and half-justifying the dumb-ass sign. "The sign maybe have been too simple for Wal-Mart," Roxanne lowballs, "but ultimately I got the damn sign delivered so I don't wanna hear shit about signs!" This is a nonsense non-point but she delivers it with a cute face that, to me at least, acknowledges the nonsense of what she's saying. See, Roxanne and Allie are both that kind of person that I do not trust to be honest in these interviews. Like when Roxanne was all, "Outsteak is GRRRRRREAT!" or all those times Allie "accidentally" called somebody an asshole in a particularly adorable and scathing way. So that's how I read the whole eye-rolling ass-cover, as a way of saying, "Yes I did, and so would you have" and "No I didn't, and furthermore I don't even have eyes, so thanks for making me feel self-conscious about that" at the same time. Which may seem apologetic, but I just don't believe in the power of editing to such a degree that I can buy Roxanne (or even Allie) just became this disingenuous asshole by walking into a Wal-Mart one morning -- or that America was just so terribly fooled that this is the veil finally being lifted. If you're looking for people to be that uncomplicated, though, I guess this is probably the show for you anyway.

Apprentice

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