Backs Against The Wal-Mart

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: B- | Grade It Now!
Lesson Twelve: Use Your Words

Mies Van Der Trump is all, "I know about design," on and on about how he's this person, and that she "missed the mark" with "lousy design." Now, if I were Tammy, I would have said, "So gold-plate the Xbox 360 and give it some fake tits, some fleur-de-lis stencils on the side, maybe a giant penis or pinecone finial coming up out the middle, that would be better?" Instead, she says there were "no better ideas," which is frigging stupid, because that's like, "My head is a box full of wadded-up tissue paper and I like the Oscars, but that's about all I got." Roxanne says it's not true, she wishes it were but it wasn't, and I just wish we'd seen it, man. Trump says Tammy's leadership wasn't good, the design stank, and he thought the room was terrible. All of which is...true. Having the attention span of your average housecat really makes this show enjoyable because when it's an "I don't like you" firing, it's exciting as all get out, because those are my favorite, but then when people get fired for task-related fuck-uppery, it's exciting as all get out, because those are my favorite. So I'm super-happy Tammy's getting fired for task-related fuck-uppery, because that hasn't happened in like, forever. And then she gets fired.

T-Bag thanks Synergy and kicks them out of the Boardroom, and as they stand, Allie turns back and starts to cutely promise there will be no more rolling of the eyes, and T-Bag's all, "Just -- just go. Just go. Okay? Just go. Enough." Couldn't have said it better myself.

Inside: "I think it was the right decision," says T-Bag, and his daughter points out that it's just going to get more difficult from here on in, and Bill yelps, "Down to the Final Four!" and shakes his fist with the little wand, jester's head on the end, and cuts a caper. T-Bag's like, "Okay. Done."

Outside: Tammy's disappointed she didn't "make it through the whole process," and now feels she wasn't "supported" by Trump, not a huge supporter of anything but athletics, so could you not get your needy in my peanut butter, but she thinks rightly that he responds more to "big personalities," and that the downfall was that she was a "problem solver" and not a "problem creator," which may be true, but wasn't the problem; the problem was that you failed to execute the task because you didn't think it through or familiarize yourself with the client or the product, and jumped in like you were giving free manicures to market Revenge Of The Sith or some shit. She says that, when it's a non-sales task, Allie and Roxanne will "crash and burn," which I think is maybe likely, but come on: they're all sales tasks now. This was like the one week that was subjective, and it was a landslide anyway. Learn to be real and read a room and not justify that shit to yourself, please -- there's nobody to complain to later, regardless of what you learned in grade school. Watch your own ass because that's what it's for, and you're always gonna have somebody on your six -- and that's what keeps you good.

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