Apprentice
Bedazzled By A Beefy T

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Fifty years, and it's come to this

Night falls. A dude sleeps in a chair on the street. But, uh, don't think about that part. We didn't mean to show that.

The next morning, Craig answers the Rhonaphone, and Rhona says that they need to meet Trump in the lobby of Trump Tower in an hour. The next thing you know, there we are in the lobby, where the candidates await Trump and the Viceroys. When they arrive, Trump welcomes them to Week 14, and tells them that they are the final four, in case they have trouble with counting. He tells them, however, that three of them will be losers. Got it? He tells Alex that he needs another team member, and it's his choice whom he wants from Magna. Alex selects…Tana. Kendra and Craig both make gritted-teeth smiling faces as Tana heads over to be with Alex. Alex and Tana hug. Craig and Kendra do not. Trump reminds them that this means each team is made up of one Book Smart and one Street Smart. Like anyone cares. Trump then tells them that the task this week somehow relates to his way of putting his name on everything, which it totally doesn't. He claims to put his name on t-shirts, and then says that when you think "t-shirts," you think of Hanes, and that's who this week's task is for. Hanes is yooge! For this task, each team will design and sell a commemorative t-shirt "celebrating 50 years of t-shirt culture." Is that a thing, "t-shirt culture"? Because I would argue that that's not a thing. Anyway, Trump tells them that they'll each have access to a "pop culture artist." Magna will be working with Romero Britto, and Net Worth will work with Burton Morris. I have to say, based on their names only, Romero sounds like a better artist than Burton, who sounds like your cousin's roommate, but I admit, that's something of an uninformed opinion. Once they've designed their shirts, they'll sell them out of Scoop stores. Whoever makes the most money wins, and the other team goes to the Boardroom.

Alex tells us that he knew immediately that Tana should be the PM, because she "has a clothing business." He then says that Kendra "was crestfallen, because she didn't want to be stuck with Craig." And then he sort of dork-laughs, like…a dork. Would laugh. You know?

We take in a few clothing-related transition shots, and then we are at Hanes, where Tana and Alex are discussing their shirt design. Alex sketches out something he refers to as "tight," and Tana agrees that it's "tight," and neither of them is or ever could be "tight," ever, but all right. Tana interviews that they were trying to come up with a slogan, and Alex came up with "Rock Star." Wow, how original. Nobody ever does anything like that. You have to go to the girls section at T.J. Maxx to find t-shirts with an edgy slogan like "Rock Star." Tana says, however, that she went for it, and their logo was eventually "Rock Star Couture." Then Burton shows up, and he shows off his portfolio, including a coffee cup image they used on Friends, as well as a stylized Fedora Guy of some sort that was used on the Oscars. Alex voices over that Burton does art that "can work really well for [their] design." Burton offers to work with them on some "sketch concepts," and Tana breaks the news that they've already been sketching, which I'm sure Burton is just thrilled to hear. Doctors always are glad to know you got started on that appendectomy while you were waiting for them to arrive. "I'm almost through the first layer of skin!"

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Apprentice

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