Bling It On

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B- | Grade It Now!
Chain wallets and small potatoes

Trump then announces that the task is to produce an 11-minute live auction for Fuse TV to benefit (you guessed it) the Elizabeth Glaser Pediatric Aids Foundation, the official charity of reality shows everywhere. (That's actually kind of true.) I knew ahead of time that Fuse was involved in this task, because of a goofy email they sent me the day of the episode wanting TWoP to pimp them or something. Because that was likely to happen. Anyway, Trump says that each team will be assigned five "artists" from the world of music -- which Trump points out adds up to a total of ten, in case your math muscles are sore -- and they'll have to come up with an "experience" they can auction off. Very similar to our old friend Isaac Miz-a-har-ee. Whoever makes more money at the auction segment (which they will produce, and which will rely on online bidding) will be the winner, and Stephanie is still exempt, should her team wind up in the Boardroom. Trump sends them out to "raise a lot of money."

Back at the L-Pal, the newly formed Magna team has nothing but excited hugs for each other. So far. Alex hugs Craig. Bren hugs Tana. Hugging, hugging, hugging! Tana gives an interview in which she says that Chris got rid of her and Craig, and now he has to deal with Stephanie and Erin, widely reputed to be "the two most obnoxious people in the suite." Out in the living room, Chris gets off to a bad start by calling out, "Come on, girls." Now remember, Chris is 22 himself. And Stephanie is 29, and Erin is 26. Even when I was 26, the first 22-year-old who called me and anyone I was with by saying, "Come on, girls" in a setting like this would leave with a broken jaw. That's unacceptable, and it's a telegraphing of exactly how he's going to act for the next hour, so don't miss it. Chris exposits that the five artists Net Worth will be working with are Barenaked Ladies, Gene Simmons, New Found Glory, Simple Plan, and Fat Joe. Aw, that started off so well with two names I had heard of, but it was all downhill from there. I am so far out of the loop, I can't even see the loop from where I am.

Chris goes out and tells John that he and "the girls" should obviously be the ones asking for things and closing deals. John tells Chris that because they're going to see guys in bands, obviously, they have to throw a lot of "chicks" at them. Chris says that indeed, he sent the team of John, Erin, and Stephanie to call on the artists. He claims that he really wanted to meet the famous people, but he and Angie headed off to work on the production side at the studio, because it was "important" that he do that. I personally suspect that Chris fears the famous. Or he's afraid that Gene Simmons will lick him on the face.

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