Apprentice
Apprentice

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: F | 677 USERS: B-
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Lesson Ten: Girls R Just Dum

The kids suddenly arrive at Trumpmoot without any morning call. Surely that means there's so much exciting footage that we can't spare a second for Rhona this week! I'll level with you -- in addition to being a frightening picture of the current problem of the American male, this episode is also bizarrely edited in the extreme. So Trump's hanging out with this guy who is a celebrity hairdresser (my favorite kind of non-celebrity!) and also a member of Trump's golf course, and wearing all-black. Bill looks terrified, but I think it's unlikely that it's because he knows what's going to happen next. Trump and hair guy talk about some shit that is so boring neither of them can actually pay too much attention, and then Trump notifies the Apprenti, for what seems like the billionth time, how he is a brand to be reckoned with. He has a fragrance (we know!), clothes...but everybody just wants to talk about his frickin' hair all the time. Apparently Trump didn't get the memo that jokes about his hair have reached an All Your Bwah Are Belong To Us level of no-longer-funny and that nobody's talking about it anymore. Except the Apprenti and Carolyn, who laugh both nervously and with no small amount of disgust. He asks one of them to "examine" his hair for authenticity, and Charmaine volunteers. She does her Charmaine Salesgirl impression that's so funny, like she's admiring one of Ron Popeil's food storage systems -- "That is definitely your hair! I never doubted it for a minute!" -- and they all laugh at what a sad old man their hero has turned out to be up close. "It may not be pretty, but it's me," Trump says (admittedly, this part is adorable), and Tarek laughs appreciatively, because the only word he's ever heard, besides "Mensa," is "pretty."

Apprentice

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