Apprentice
Bringing Down The House

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Fop till you drop

Over at the Apex house, an aggressive bass guitar can only mean that Baldford is talking about primer again. And what do you know? He is! Kevin, in other news, is all excited because he has a contractor coming over who was a referral from a broker he had called. "So he's out of the box," Kevin says excitedly. Now...consider what that means. Does he mean "outside the box," like you have to be a wacky contractor to be referred by a real estate broker? Does he actually mean "out of the box"? What does that even mean? Do most contractors require assembly? ["I think it's similar in meaning to 'plug and play.' Still. Though it pains me: shut it, Kevin." -- Sars] Kevin tells us that he "took it upon [him]self" to get the contractor, and we see him tell the guys that he'll be handing out Heinekens "at 3:00 on Sunday." Do you suppose he gave a deadline of 3:00 and Mosaic gave a deadline of 2:00? Because I think giving an artificial deadline an hour early would be very, very smart, and I'm wondering if that's what Wes did. The contractor asks Kevin when he's supposed to start, and they're like, "Uh, now." The guy looks a little surprised, but takes it on. Raj expresses a concern that they're giving the guy more than he's going to be able to do, but the guy says, "Never too much!" And of course, a contractor is the best possible source for how much work you should give him, ARGH. Baldford interviews that Carlos got to be their contractor basically because Kevin was "amped" about hiring him.

In a fateful conversation with Kevin, Raj says that he's concerned about Carlos "flaking," and while eating a pizza, Raj says that contractors not being done when they're supposed to be done is not exactly an unusual happening. In an interview, Raj declares himself officially "nervous about Carlos."

And now, Mr. Apprentice, tear down this wall! Raj throws his shoulder into the wall he wants to remove and puts a big dent into it. You know, when you see a dent like that at a frat house, it always seems so unlikely, but it's really so easy to do. You don't even need the keg, although it helps. I actually know a guy who broke his hand punching a bathroom wall at the prom due to hurt feelings of some kind. Hee. But...come to think of it, I can't remember which of my friends it is. It's probably telling that I know more than one guy I can picture doing that. Ivana looks on, shocked, as Raj begins to tear at the drywall. He knocks into it a couple more times, but when Ivana takes a shot, she doesn't even leave a mark and also? You guessed it. She hurts her shoulder. Because she's a girl, get it? We're made of feathers and confetti. As the team tears out the wall, Raj interviews that human nature contains the natural desire "both to destroy and to create." But mostly destroy. He claims that they're doing both, and then says, "This makes Raj happy." Oh, ew. Talking about yourself in the third person is such a bad idea.

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Apprentice

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