Circus, Circus

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B+ | Grade It Now!
The big gamble

We return to a title card saying, "It's Easier to Think Big," and for some reason I can only assume is contractual, we are forced to sit through a pitch by Trump for a new golf course he's building somewhere in New Jersey. Like I care. The only reason this footage is any fun at all is that it's very windy, and he does comment that the way the wind is whipping his hair, at least it will be obvious that it's not a toupee. I will say this, though -- the wind may reveal that that's his real hair, but it also reveals just how far back on his head that real hair actually begins when it's not all fluffy. And how far back is it? Pretty far. The fluffery ain't for nothing, y'all.

Katrina explains the task in a little more detail, including the fact that when they get a person registered for their game, the person then gets a card that's swiped when they play in the casino, so you know how much money they've spent. Bill explains that his team's game is that you spin the wheel for a chance to be entered in a drawing for a $1,000 giveaway. Troy says that at 10:00 AM, they already had a line "lit'rally" out the door for their game. Pretty good. We watch as they open the game and a guy pulls off a winning spin and drops his ticket in the drum for the drawing. Meanwhile, Katrina repeats that her team is raffling off a car rental valued at $300. Wow, that's quite an impressive snore. Amy explains that her team thought they needed "manpower" to "recruit people" to come play their game. So since they needed manpower, they got pretty models. As you do. Amy even harasses one guy herself, opening with a spiel about how they're doing a "Crossfire giveaway," and telling him only after he's started talking to her that all you get is a weekend car rental. Cheap. So very, very cheap and lame. I hate this kind of bait-and-switch. It's right up there with those official-looking mailings that are designed to make me think I'll be arrested if I don't open them, when in fact they're just trying to sell me life insurance. Over at VersaCorp, Kwame asks Bill if Protégé is giving away the car, and Bill tells him no, they're just giving away a rental. The guys both think this is a pretty stupid idea. "Aw, hell no," Kwame says with a smile. Heh. One guy walks away from the VersaCorp model while she's trying to entice him, and she does not look happy at all. No one walks away from Princess!

Boyfriend Bill takes up his position at the VIP registration desk, where he has arranged for access to the VIPs. This, he explains, gives you a shot at signing up the guys who spend more money in the casino. He explains that he had "secured exclusive rights" to do this ahead of time -- to work that particular counter. He also has a dancer from the Fercos Brothers show (I believe) who escorts people from the counter over to the line where they can sign up. Boyfriend Bill opines that the VIP line is going to be the "make or break scenario." Amy sees what Bill is doing, and she sends one of her girls over there to jump all over the same VIPs. Amy admits in an interview that she was poaching the other team's "great idea," which she hadn't thought of. Bill, who you'll remember said before that he had arranged for exclusive access to the VIPs, is not thrilled that the VIPs who are approaching are now going to be accosted by two people at the same time, and he gripes to the girls behind the desk that "it's like a used car lot. Someone walks on the lot and they get attacked by the vultures." He gets together with Kwame and, very frustrated, grumps that "the other team obviously can't come up with an original idea, so they've got their hookers over here working my customers." Ah, yes, Bill's frustrated and he's venting, which doesn't really bother me, but I do think he's destined to be frustrated if he gets this vent-y every time somebody acts kind of tacky and low. It is a Burnett show, after all. Once Bill is fully vented, he and Kwame shake hands, and Kwame says he understands why Bill doesn't want to leave right now. It appears that Kwame was asking Bill to go do something, and Bill was explaining that he wanted to stay, because he was pissed off that his VIPs -- to whom he had negotiated access ahead of time -- were getting poached by models working for VersaCorp, which, as he said, didn't seem to have a single decent idea this entire episode.

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