Crimes Of Fashion

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B- | Grade It Now!
When did "capelets" become all the rage?

We move over to Mosaic, which has split itself into two groups. Kevin, Wes, and Andy are off talking to buyers, while Raj, Kelly, Chris, and John are going with Ilse to the design school, where she's going to be doing the work on the clothes. There is a fairly painful sequence in which the guys, with no idea what they're talking about, try to communicate with Ilse about the clothes she proposes to design. It's like watching four guys try to speak Latin to a cat. Kelly says that he was frustrated by the way the other guys were "futzing around," so when Ilse left, he "sketched one out." And indeed, Kelly turns out to have some sketching abilities, and he roughs out a drawing of a three-quarter-length jacket with a slightly flared sleeve that...isn't entirely ugly, actually. The collar is a little too imposing, but other than that. "You put a nice hot model in that with no top, that looks great," John offers. Way to ruin the moment, tool. Chris marvels in an interview about Kelly's facility drawing clothing. "After today, I'm pretty surprised he's not wearin' pink camouflage underwears," Chris says. Yes, "underwears." And with that, he is officially Joe Junior from While You Were Sleeping, which is not a compliment. Anyway, when Ilse returns, even she seems to approve of Kelly's drawing, so...go, military guy with fashion flair. I guess that's what he does when everybody else is...standing in formation or something. Kelly's off drawing women's jackets. Pretty brave for a guy named "Kelly," but I guess that's why he chose a profession where he can carry grenades.

In the ongoing effort to spoil the endings every time, the Trump motto this week is "Know Your Market." Trump lectures to the camera about how whenever he builds anything, he knows what the market is. And what is the Trump market? The insanely rich. I mean, it looks that way, at least. I've never seen anything by Trump on sale at Sam's Club. We see him pimping his books, and he talks about pinpointing the market and whatever. And then we are with Jen M. and Elizabeth as they visit with buyers. One woman tells them that the "focus of the line" will be the selling point, more than colors or fabrics. Another guy tells them that themes would include quality and luxury. And, judging from the clothes both teams are going to produce, another theme would be "total impracticality in any actual work setting." Another one tells them that the line can't be priced in such a way that it's out of whack with the other stuff in the store. Jen says that while the buyer meetings were a bit rushed, the buyers gave a lot of useful information.

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