Apprentice
Decision Time (3)

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Miss Alli: C- | Grade It Now!
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Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, K-E-L-L-Y...

And now, in one of those moments of awesomeness that you couldn't have scripted if you had tried, Trump goes to Matthew Calamari, who is Trump's COO. Calamari looks around nervously. "Donald, you know I don't care for Jen very much, to be honest with you, um, because..." He stares at the ceiling. "Wow," he says. He tries again. "Because, uh...well. I'm not doing too good," he says, looking at Regis. We cut to Carolyn, wearing an expression I would call "Oh, sweet Lord, Matthew, I hope you snap out of it, although on the other hand, if you don't, I'm going to cackle into my executive chair until drool runs down my chin." "Why are you looking at me?" Regis says to Calamari helpfully. "I don't know," Calamari says, as George chuckles. And for a minute, it looks like Calamari might pull it together. Trump goes all soft and mushy and tries to help him by saying, "Who do you like, of the two?" "I like Kelly," Calamari finally spits out. "I think that, um..." But now he's in the weeds. Again. About to pass out, I suspect, Calamari plunks back into his chair. "Hey, Regis!" Trump says cheerfully, not all that concerned that someone he works closely with just lived out certain dreams he has had since he was six years old, except that in real life, he did at least get to wear pants. "People think this stuff is easy, right?" Trump laughs.

Next, Trump sends Regis to Michael Fraizer, the mysterious individual seen bidding $1000 at Jen's auction and, as it happens, the head of Genworth. Fraizer calls Jen and Kelly "two great people" who ran "two great events." But in the end, "Business is all about setting a direction." He says that "Kelly showed broad leadership, and he was a more disciplined executor. Jen worked hard, and the team worked hard, but they were just disorganized, and Kelly would be a great addition to the Trump organization." So, you know. Not exactly "Jen's breath smells and she robbed my house," but you can start to see the writing on the wall.

And now, Trump sends Regis to talk to Troy. Awww, Troy! Before Troy can talk, Trump has to remind him that he's "the country bumpkin that was smarter than the city slickers." Well..."country bumpkin"? Thanks, asshole. "That's what they say, anyways," Troy says, through a smile that says, "I may never own you, but I will soak you for every penny I can get, and one day, I will own the nursing home in which you reside, and you will lose every game of pinochle you play, because I will fix every deck myself." He has to remind us again about the high-school yearbook quote (enough about that, Troy, seriously), and then he says that, as he has observed the two candidates, he thinks that Kelly has "guts and instincts" that "can't be taught." He also praises Kelly's self-discipline, and says he thinks Kelly should be the guy. And if not, it should be Kwame, because it sounds a lot like "Kelly" and Troy loooooooves Kwame.

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Apprentice

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