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"Those Beeyotches Are Gonna Be Sorry"

Somewhere in New York, Joan Rivers is walking down the street when Trump calls and asks her to go to each place and tell him which one is best. But he doesn't want them to know Trump sent her. He's giving the winning team $10,000. She says she'll grab her pastry chef at God's Love We Deliver, since he knows food, and says she'll do it. She'd love to. At Tenacity Burger, Holly wants to help their big donors jump the line, but everyone else is just doing photos or sitting at the counter helping people (Carol!). Carol thinks Holly should have been the one to bring in the big donors, but she didn't want to do anything that would mess up her manicure.

Joan and her pastry chef show up at the guy's restaurant first, and she gives Sinbad a tip not to trust anyone (apparently he opened for her in Vegas once). Bret doesn't know what drove her down here, other than he told everyone in New York about this. Maybe they didn't watch last season. Rod's busy schmoozing with everyone as the burger Curtis made for Joan just sits there and sits there, for more than six minutes. Joan isn't happy about the service, or the prices, or the fact that her burger's cold. Then Joan heads to Tenacity Burger, where everyone's excited to see her. Carol says she was an inspiration for her to get into comedy. Joan loves the women's menu because it had fair prices, with a bigger price point if you want to give to charity. Joan feels like this is a tough decision, because $10,000 could mean winning or losing to the team.

At RockSolid, Bret needs a soda because he hasn't taken care of his diabetes all day. Sinbad gets him a soda, and Goldberg takes over as the waiter while he drinks up. The women try to fill up their tables as time's running out. Cyndi says she's very proud of this wonderful team of ass-kicking women. Holly says some of the big donors that promised to show up for her got left in the line, and she wasn't able to get out there and bring them in. She says if they lose, she'll wonder how that would have factored in. At RockSolid, Goldberg thanks everyone for coming. Curtis isn't underestimating the girls, but they did raise a lot of money. We'll see about that, won't we?

Boardroom. Don and Ivanka wait. The contestants shuffle in, and then Trump joins. I can't decide who's more of a mess: Cyndi or Bret. Cyndi's hair is ratted all over her head, looking messy and weird. Trump comes in and compliments her hairdo, which ... well, that's all you need to know, really. They bond over their hair. She tells him she thinks their team raised a lot of money, and she thinks they raised more than the men. Sharon says the team is unbelievable, working, working, working all day long. Cyndi and Sharon both say there wasn't a weak player. Trump tries to get them to say there was a weak player, but Cyndi won't say anyone was weak. She says there's nothing they could have done more, even though Trump says she's putting herself on the line. They ask if anyone didn't have any friends come in and donate, and ask specifically about Carol. Cyndi thought Joan came for her, but Don explains she was there for the task, and was at both places. Cyndi, totally loopy, is confused by this. Trump says he'll tell them later who Joan liked better, then moves on to the men.

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