Apprentice

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DeAnn Welker: C | Grade It Now!
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It's A Woman's World

Previously: Scott Hamilton was an ass and an idiot who named his Zappos.com character "EEE." He tried to throw Tom Green under the bus, and Trump almost fell for it because he loves Scott Hamilton so much.

And now, Herschel's back with everyone else, telling them he thinks it might be Scott. I don't know if he means Scott might be safe or might be fired, but hopefully he was smart enough to see how very fired Scott should have been. Jesse tells everyone that Herschel almost beat up Tom, adding a new syllable to this phrase: "Right now-uh!" Hee. Herschel tells them all how Tom volunteered to be the next PM, and Herschel thinks that might be the best thing for Tom to do, because it might make Tom show leadership. Tom comes in, to what seems like a lot of groaning. Then Jesse tells the camera later that Tom's "just one of those creative dude's that's kind of a dipshit that you've just got to put up with ... but he did actually say a lot of stuff that makes sense." Tom's telling everyone that zapatos means shoes in Spanish, and people seem annoyed since they are "well aware." Jesse goes on that Tom's big behavior is funny, but he can't command respect without earning it first. "Money, money, money, mon-ay" opening credits. Annie Duke fondles her poker chips. Ew.

Inspirational music plays as Khloe hugs some old guy named Bob and tells him how handsome he looks. She asks him how the charity is doing. She tells us she's playing for the Brent Shapiro Foundation, "to bring drug and alcohol awareness." She doesn't tell us where the foundation is bringing this awareness, but apparently this foundation makes people aware of drugs and alcohol. Awesome. She explains that Brent was a dear friend of hers and his father, Robert Shapiro, was a lawyer with her father on the OJ Simpson trial. She tells Bob that she "did a challenge" that she was project manager of, and that she won, so he gets $20,000 to make people aware of drugs and alcohol. She then tells us that Brent Shapiro died from "drug addiction," and goes on to talk about her own mistakes, including a very public DUI. She wants to "vocalize" that and teach people from her mistakes. Do you know what I want? For her to learn to actually say what she means instead of talking nonsense. Someone get this girl a grammar lesson.

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Apprentice

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