Apprentice
Apprentice

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B+ | 791 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Lonely Planet Hollywood

Inside, Boyfriend Bill looks pensive. He's surveying the restaurant and noticing that it's nearly empty. Boy, if it's that empty, it's got bigger problems than Nick's failure to drag in enough guys and their sisters. Such as being about six times as big as it needs to be to accommodate everyone to whom it has ever occurred that they might want to eat or drink there. Bill says he thinks the outside guys are just not doing enough to get people into the building. Bowie brings him some merchandise numbers, and they're not so hot either. Bill interviews that pushing the swag was supposed to be Bowie's responsibility. We see Bowie trying to sell to the customers, and they're just not buying. Not buying the pictures, not buying the shirts, just...not buying. Nick tells Bill that he thinks they need to "step it up" and find some other way to bring people in. "We need some magic to happen here real quick," Bill says into the camera. He goes outside and makes it very clear to Kwame that they need more people inside, period, because they're dying. Troy says that "it's time to do something drastic," because they "need to be hoppin' [and] poppin' like a frog on a hot plate." Hee. Troy is an crusty old farmer trapped in the body of an underwear model. And honestly, what's not to like about that? The fellas of VersaCorp agree that they need to find some way to "create a buzz."

Back to S4, where Protégé is preparing to go out. Katrina says that they're going out for two reasons. First, because they "worked [their] butts off yesterday." (If, by "working your butt off," she means "drinking with customers and wearing XXS shirts," I suppose they did.) But then her second reason is, "We deserve it." Hey, how are those two reasons? That's not two reasons to go out! That's one reason, dressed up to look like two. Katrina can't count very high. The women go out for sushi (predictably), and of course, they spend their time dishing boys. As you do. They guess at what VersaCorp's members are currently doing. "Bowie's out yelling," someone suggests. Heh. Assorama guesses that Kwame is giving a lengthy speech about what he learned at MBA school, which...yeah, not.

Apprentice

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