Lenny tells Trump he should fire everybody on the team, and then yells about the Lazy Jews, and how he's Jewish but he's good enough at it that he doesn't have to practice it in any way, and everybody's grossed out, especially Dan and Lee and even Trump, and Lenny goes off on this whole speech about how the smartest thing he could do is celebrate their stupid made-up holiday so that he wouldn't have to do work because he really needs a rest from the burden of denying so very much of reality all the time, and how fucking stupid he is not to use his Jewishness to his advantage like Dan and Lee. It's ugly and stupid and dirty and I don't like Lenny at all. Trump finally cuts him off: "Lenny, it's called life." That is the most hilarious thing Trump has done all season. Crazy old weirdo. "It's called life, Lenny. Some people are Jewish and they go to temple, other people are not, and they like steak. That's why they have menus in restaurants, because sometimes your Plan B is spaghetti, and Melania would never forgive you for eating spaghetti. It's called life."
They ask Charmaine whether the horrific comedian issue was a "mistake," and she denies this, saying that Kahaney was "funny but off-color," and admits that they paid her $1700 for that crap, and Bill gets super-mad because she's not taking any responsibility for the issue, and yeah, it looks pretty bad, and I don't know that Charmaine really gets that yet. Just because you say something wasn't a problem doesn't mean it wasn't a problem, Charmaine. It's a little more complicated than that. Bryce tells Trump to fire Lenny, and then Trump just completely opts out of the Boardroom for the remainder, talking all about how Lenny's "a comedian" and how he's funnier than Cory Kahaney, and whatever, just talking out of his ass about Lenny for awhile, I assume to make us more comfortable with the fact that his worthless ass is going to be sticking around for some time. Theresa's all, "Um, he's not that funny," and Trump takes us yet one more step away from the task at hand, getting into some kind of technical discussion with her about how she only finds him unfunny because she hates him, and she follows his lead into pointlessness, all over Lenny about how they don't "really" hate each other. It's so stupid. Bryce, eyes on the prize, is like, "Fire Lenny because he is an asshole and he crosses the line." Lenny freaks out on him and they get into another shouting match, but Trump's back on the whole Lenny-as-comedian topic, and how they should have hired Lenny instead of Cory Kahaney, and he repeats this over and over, like a hundred times, to himself. So you've got Bryce and Lenny screaming, and Trump babbling endlessly about Lenny and Cory Kahaney, and Bill shooting hate daggers all over with his diamond-hard gel-head bullshit slicing anger figures in the air, and Theresa in the middle, eyes almost crossing with how crazy she's getting, but nobody is noticing how Emily Rose she is about to be, because of all the unrelated pandemonium going on all around her. And this is why I love The Apprentice.













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