And then, we are back, live! Sigh. Trump asks Kelly for his opinion of how the Army experience has been helpful in business, and didn't we all just totally tune in to see this? I care! I do! I care! Okay, I don't. Kelly blathers some hoo-hah about teamwork and passion and the inspiration provided by green undies and whatnot, and I could not be more bored. "Excuse me," Trump says, "do you love working for Trump?" "I love it," Kelly insists. Trump isn't satisfied. "You love it?" he asks again. "Absolutely, absolutely," Kelly says. "WHO'S YOUR DADDY?" Trump demands to know. Okay, I'm exaggerating. But not much. What he does say is, "Say it like a West Point cadet. Come on." You know, I may make a note of that line. I might find occasion to use it. "Say it like a West Point cadet." Seriously. Purr it to yourself. See? Promising! Anyway. Kelly: "Hoo-ah." He is a giant ball of personality, that one. The upside is that he makes Boyfriend Bill look like a real lampshade-on-the-head kind of guy.
Trump makes a rather porny reference to having just "extended Bill" (hee), and Bill grins, and wow, he has aged a billion years. His face is suddenly all skinny and pointy. It's like all the fluid has drained out of it or something, and his teeth look funny, and his hair is too square, and Boyfriend Bill, what have they done to you? Bill tries his hardest to say it like a ten-dollar hooker -- I mean, "West Point cadet" -- when he insists that he "had a great year." And he's learned a lot, et cetera. Boyfriend Bill is asked for his opinion on the remaining candidates. He says that they should both be honored to be here. He tells Tana that he thinks she's a "hustler," which is oddly appropriate, but that to lead people successfully, you kind of can't ridicule them constantly, because you have to "bring out the best" in them. Kelly, over on the other side, makes a face and mocks Trump, all, "Nyah, nyah, 'say it like a West Point cadet.'" At least that's what's happening in the version playing in my head. Tana jumps in to insist that her team was very motivated, and they think she was "a great enthusiast." She insists that it wasn't a "Tana task," it was a "Net Worth/Street Smarts task." So don't listen to the part where she declared right after it was over that she did the whole thing herself. She totally didn't mean it. "I still don't think your team likes you very much," Trump says. "Why don't you ask them, Mr. Trump?" Tana chirps, thinking this is in the bag. He says he's going to. But not before a commercial. We must have a commercial! What do you think this is, a marathon? Trump is made of flesh and blood, people. Flesh and blood! (And space-age polymers.)