Let's Get Physical

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: B+ | 2 USERS: A-
Lesson One: Don't Make People Hate You

The valet at Trump National looks just like several of the male candidates, who mostly are identical. Brian and James are only different people if they're standing up, because Brian is short and tad bit better-looking. Mark is creepy and Markus is sad, blond Josh wears emo glasses while blond Clay looks Botoxed, Chris is huge and has dimples, and Adam is about to turn twelve. The women fare better, although it's often difficult to tell the difference between Rebecca, Toral, and Jennifer W., unless you're close up. Felisha, Alla, and Jennifer M. are all intense with long blonde hair, but at least you can tell Felisha by her frumpy clothes.

We meet Jennifer M. next, who is very cool, hard but gracious. I'm looking forward to her really getting in there. She looks exactly like a corporate communications major at SMU, which is to say: like an oil money sorority sister. Twenty-six, she was Miss Oregon USA and a top ten finalist at Miss USA 2004. She was home-schooled and started working full time at 17, inspired by her entrepreneur father. By 20 she was breaking sales records with Qwest Dex, and at 23 was the youngest manager at an international advertising firm, where she consistently exceeded her goals by more than 200%. See, doesn't that stuff make your heart sing! I love how you can be proud of these people's accomplishments right off the bat. It makes it more fun.

Marshawn tells us that in her work, she's been able to able to represent gang members, drug dealers, and prostitutes…but also Presidents. Amusingly, she says this experience will be easy to adapt to working with CEOs and executives, but she leaves out which areas of expertise will be most helpful there. Born and raised in Dallas, TX, she relocated to DC, where she was named Miss District of Columbia and went on to the third runner-up place at Miss America. I don't know anything about pageants, so this seems worthless to me. However, she's immensely charming and charismatic, which is good, because she's the CEO of a professional development and public speaking consulting agency that works with politicians, athletes, entertainers, and media personalities. Love that. It means she's going to be really fun to watch working the people over and getting all Sales all the time. She's definitely the strongest person we've seen thus far.

The legal references she makes necessitate a slight digression, because her CV is jam-packed. It comes from the fact that she's a "national spokesperson on youth crime prevention and leadership development," and has worked with the Justice Department as a co-founder of the National Youth Network. She graduated magna from TCU and was named one of Glamour's "Top Ten College Women." Her J.D. is from the Georgetown University Law Center, and she's worked criminal defense in the Juvenile Justice Clinic and as a litigator on Georgetown's International Commercial Arbitration Team competing in Vienna, Austria.

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