Trees! Were still out in the sticks. In "Pennsylvania." Backstage at QVC, we go down the hall and find a red light sign hanging from the ceiling that says, "QUIET PLEASE." I have to think that's someone's version of a shout-out, because otherwise, it's just too funny. Carolyn and George are watching the Apex run-through, which is being directed by Elizabeth from the control room. Pamela is in the control room, too. The rehearsal begins, and one thing becomes instantaneously clear. And what is it? Maria is not intended to be on television in this capacity. Or probably in any capacity. She's like her usual self, only six times as much so. As soon she starts to talk, she twitches and blinks even more than usual. She's the kind of person who is so atrocious on camera that I would actually spend the rest of the week telling people about the crazy woman I saw on QVC who looked like her arms were attached with rubber bands. Elizabeth makes a funny face as she realizes that Maria is decompensating as they do the run-through. Pamela also makes a very funny scrunchy face. Keep in mind that Maria is not someone they thrust in front of the camera against her will. This is someone who sold herself as a wonderful public speaker, who nonetheless looks like she is hosting a tic festival between her eyes. Pamela, interestingly, shows her lack of skill with word choice when she chooses to frustratedly refer to Maria as "gregarious." That is definitely not the word she's looking for. I'm not sure whether she's looking for something related to gyrating or what, but she's definitely not looking for the word "gregarious." Pamela hits the nail on the head, however, when she says that Maria "looks like she's having a seizure." See? No big words. Keep the description simple. "Like she's having a seizure." Or, as I would have said it, "like she needs sedation." On the other hand, Jen is very good in front of the camera. Pamela and Elizabeth decide that the person to run the presentation is obviously Jen, which means someone has to break some bad news to Maria. Even George shakes his head as the women's presentation finishes up. Maria? Horrible.
Episode Report CardMiss Alli: B | 559 USERS: C+
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