Motel 666

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B | Grade It Now!
The no-sell motel

Maybe the best Trump motto ever comes up: "Respect Comes From Winning." Hee. We watch Trump playing golf with Annika Sorenstam, and then Trump talks about how Vince Lombardi could boss around big football players because he was a winner, pure and simple. It's the same thing that lets Trump...boss around Annika Sorenstam? Because he can beat her at football? I'm not sure I follow, but that's all right. I don't need to understand everything.

In the Magna van, they're pulling into the Sea Garden, which is the name of their motel. A motel at which I would never stay, because it already sounds like it would be really moldy. ["And, from past work experience, let me assure you also that going in the pool is extremely unwise." -- Sars] We learn that Michael is functioning as their PM, because he's in real estate, like Brian. He also claims to have "a knack of completing projects quickly." The team takes in what is clearly water damage to the ceiling, and Erin cringes at the idea that buildings might contain mold. (Told you!) Boy, is she out of the loop. Also, the toilets are ugly. Also, there are bugs. The team looks fairly unhappy, but they obviously don't have much of a choice at this point. Outside on the sidewalk, Verna meets with Michael about her role in "accounting" and "customer relations," but reminds her that "there's a floating element," which is Michael for "you also have to clean, so don't think you don't." She tries to run down a bunch of customer service ideas she has, but Michael cuts her off, saying that his priority is the rooms, because if the rooms suck, customer service is just not going to do all that much. Verna, I think, really doesn't want to clean rooms, because she's insistent that they spend time right now talking about "making sure that the guests have a great time." Michael insists that this is "small stuff" at this point. Verna interviews that Michael is focusing on the physical renovation, which she says is "only one half of the majority [sic] of the work" that they should be doing. She and Michael continue arguing, because he can't bring himself to argue over a welcome package until the ceilings aren't falling down. Makes sense to me. If the plaster falls on you while you're enjoying your complimentary cleansing mask, the effect will sort of be spoiled.

Chris and some of the other guys continue touring rooms. Chris interviews that he was "extremely confident" about the task, because he apparently has some relevant expertise in "renovating homes." Or some experience he hopes is relevant, or something. John mentions that they really don't need to agonize over which ceilings are bad, because if they have the ceilings popcorned, they'll just have them all done. Yeah, the popcorning doesn't take so long. It's ugly, but fast. (You can imagine me looking up at my popcorny ceiling right now. I could achieve the same effect with Elmer's Glue and oatmeal in about six minutes.)

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