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Miss Alli: B+ | Grade It Now!
Sam's Enchanted Leaving

Speaking of teamwork (and restraining orders), Assorama and Katrina are now engaged in a fight that has apparently flared up at some point in the morning while they're getting ready to go. As, I have a feeling, is her general approach to arguing, Assorama is calmly talking down to Katrina as Katrina becomes more and more frustrated. I've argued with people like that before, who refuse to react and just keep looking at you like you're nuts while they calmly insult you, and indeed, it is infuriating. Finally, Katrina goes from catty to cloying as she insists that she's "a good person." I hate to say it, but "good person," on its own, is kind of a meaningless distinction, and not really much of an argument in your favor. Assorama tells Katrina that, as she has said all along, she "didn't come here to make friends." It's a good thing, too, because if she did, I would think her strategy needed a few minor adjustments. Assorama insists to Katrina, as she always does, that nothing is ever her fault -- all the other women are just unreasonably sensitive. They bicker some more, and then Katrina gets off her only good line of the night -- or, actually, her only good line of the show so far -- when she snaps, "Life's too short to be a bitch." Heh. Yeah, that's totally my motto, except on days when it's, "Life's too short not to be a bitch," also known as, "Life's too short to be a needy, ingratiating doormat."

The fight escalates as Katrina asks Assorama if she really thinks she can be successful in the business world doing nothing but making enemies. Assorama insists that she already is successful in the business world, because she went "from the Projects to the White House." First of all, as the Eagle-Eyed Forum Posters have already discerned, it appears that her White House experience was likely inadequate to allow anyone you've ever heard of to pick her out of a lineup. Second, what does working in the White House have to do with success in the business world? Is Assorama arguing that everyone who could argue they've worked "in the White House" is some kind of brilliant, admirable business whiz? Is that even a job in the business world? Assorama also says that she was in a position to "sit with the President of the United States." I'd be interested to know exactly how much "sitting with the president" was involved in Assorama's job. I certainly do hope to hear more about that later, because...frankly, from what I've gleaned so far? It doesn't appear that she was exactly a close personal advisor. After all, she's twenty-nine now, which would make her twenty-five when she worked at the White House, so I somehow doubt her job duties involved drafting pay equity legislation as opposed to, say, stapling. ["Or maybe 'sit with the President' is some kind of special euphemism that only White House interns know about, if you know what I'm saying." -- Wing Chun] Rather than elaborate on any particular accomplishment, Assorama simply declares that she's "been successful again and again and again," even though she's using an experience from four years ago to prove how cool she is -- another reliable indicator of puffery. Why doesn't she ever brag about what she's doing now? Why doesn't she ever brag about an accomplishment rather than a status -- about something she's actually done, rather than the fact of having been hired for a particular job? I'm sure the White House has its share of unimpressive people, like all workplaces do, and if she's not one of them, then she ought to be able to point to something she did while she was there. You know, "sitting with the president" and everything.

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