Seams Stress

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B- | Grade It Now!
And now for something completely...uhh...

And now, here comes a very discombobulated Net Worth, stumbling through the front door late. Angie asks Chris whether, by chance, he brought the jean jacket, because it turns out that the model did not bring it, as they thought he was going to. Chris doesn't have it. No one has it. The jacket, she is missing. "It just got surreal from then," Angie tells us. She tries to line up the models for the presentation, and we are led to believe that American Eagle guy is getting twitchy over all the waiting. Angie dives into her presentation thusly: "We're very excited today. Net Worth is very very proud to present American Eagle's...American Eagle Outfitters' new spring line, Beach Tech." Yeah. She didn't even have a first sentence that was finished, and she read that entire mess off her notes. Her torn-from-my-day-planner, raggedy-edged notes. She goes on: "Umm..." Alex says that Angie seemed not to be "focused" during the presentation, right from the beginning. He compares it to a high-school communications class, and I really can't argue. "Um, technology is the language of the world, it's the language of the new people…" I'm sorry, the "new people"? What people are those? It sounds like she's designing clothing to fit a new race of aliens. She wraps up with the following gem: "Uhhh...and you'll see them being featured in our line today." Good Lord. I know that's horrifying when it happens to you, because you kind of want to immediately burst into flames and die, but seriously, lady. Two introductory sentences? You had time for that. She goes to the first model. "This is, um, this is, uh, Travis, uh, Trace, and he, of course, is wearing the hoodie." Of course. This is the laptop jacket, because Net Worth's first great idea is that you'll carry around your laptop in the back of your hoodie. Seriously. Which will be great, as long as you have the ultra-light kind of laptop, and as long as you don't, like, sit down, or stand against anything, and no one bumps into you or anything like that. It would be awesome at the beach! They have a similar one on one of their female models, only it's pink, of course, because girls love pink.

American Eagle guy asks what the most important piece of technology is to the AE consumer, and Angie names the iPod. Now, in fairness to Angie, I might have said that, too -- I might have just assumed cell phones were barely "gadgets" anymore, and I might have named the iPod. It's not like that's a horrible answer, but it's not the one he wants, so that's one point off for Angie. (Oh, give me a break. I'm trying to cut the lady a little slack. Her team sent her up there to present a laptop down the back of a jacket -- she's not exactly showing off a 12-carat diamond.

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