Nicole's mom tells him he looks cute in the hedge, and then Nicole threatens to "fill" her mom in on "the situation." Situation? Oh, right. The problem that isn't actually a problem, but which you'll complain about whenever you want because being a victim feels a lot like being the one in control, and that's your approach to everything. "I'm going to whine to my mommy and then she'll tell me that I'm right and you're wrong, and somehow this will make you fall in love with me." Tim's like, "How awkward." It's not awkward, it's retarded, and I'm so tired of both of them that I can't even believe it. Whatever you're trying to prove, you've now gotten so irritating that you're proving the opposite. Nicole: "My mom's really loyal." Oh, shit. So then OMG she starts telling her mom her sick version of life, how she's pretty and everybody likes her despite her voice, but events keep conspiring to put her in the position of complaining and celebrating others' misfortunes. Tim is running around the yard feeling dicey about it, and everybody else is bored. They finally hold an intervention about how pathetic Tim is. James wonders why he went to the hedge at all, interviewing: "A man has some pride! He doesn't understand that this woman is killing him!" James and Frank desperately try to get Tim to drop the whole thing and stop trying to prove he's not gay, because everybody already knows he's not gay, but proving it is now the thing he's gay about, and it's awkward. Tim interviews with this ecstatic overjoyed face about how crazy it is and how stupid it is to be in a relationship and be a guy with a girlfriend on this show! You know what, fuck it. He's Nicole. He's the same as Nicole. This is what the boy version of that looks like.
Episode Report CardJacob Clifton: C | 696 USERS: C+
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