Apprentice
Apprentice

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: B- | 797 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Lesson Eight: If There Is No "Try," You're All Screwed

Brian says they tried to make up for it with research, because they weren't all too familiar with the series, and Trump's like, "Okay, but it escaped your notice that the main point of the whole thing is fucking Darth Vader? When you sat right here in front of me, virgins and gay dudes and a Martian and no Jenthura, and watched the goddamn trailer with me?" Brian, because he never met a self-effacing, suicidal remark that he didn't embrace, is like, "Well really though, we lost because the execs never gave us the gist of the…" and Carolyn's on it like a whole WASP-y school of helmet-haired piranha: "You would've gotten the gist had you gone to the meeting. You missed this meeting: you missed all this information."

Trump tells Brian he's disappointed, because for weeks he's not stepped up. He asks "Martian" to concur, and she says something out of the blue about how "Brian's heart is not in this anymore" and she doesn't think he wants to stay in. I wonder where that's coming from; that's an interesting comment. Especially because that's what I was going to say about Marshawn, until she beat me to it. Things get even more tense when Trump asks, "You wanna go home to Murray Hill?" And yeah, you know what's coming. "You know what, it's only 30 blocks up the road." I'm sorry, but that's a shitty, shitty thing to say -- it's like on America's Next Top Model when Tyra told my Kyle she was going back to Dairy Queen. Way too harsh for the moment. Janice could pull that shit off, but Trump and Tyra just seem like total dicks when they try it. To his credit, I think Brian gives Trump that look ("What? You can't possibly have just said that shit to me.") you give a guy right before you punch him in the face. Either that, or another in a series of shocked-almost-in-tears faces he makes, I'm not sure. I like Option A. Either way, though: adrenaline.

Apprentice

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