Store Wars

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: C+ | Grade It Now!
Lesson Eight: If There Is No "Try," You're All Screwed

Carolyn wonders why -- once a teammate has offered to cover for your sudden lack of stones -- a person wouldn't be shamed into stepping up. This is a question that has no answer, so Trump tags in to give Rebecca the floor, which she takes with her usual freaky earth-shaking vibe. "I was fearful that we would take up too much time discussing whether or not she wanted to present. I wanted to get the job done, and do it to the absolute top of our ability, and I wanted to keep the focus on our project, and away from whatever people were feeling outside of that." Bill takes this pass and gets about ten yards: "Wouldn't it be logical at this point in the process to really accentuate your strengths? Step up the game and really showcase what you have? Because the window of opportunity is closing really quickly." She agrees whole-heartedly with each sentence as it comes, and then replies, "You're right, Bill. And I was prepared, and ready to…" Trump's like, "Whatever, but how could you do that to your team?"

Marshawn interrupts him a whole lot all of a sudden, trying to get back to how she's grooming Rebecca to be the next Apprentice or whatever the hell, and Trump just falls back to repeating over and over, "Was it your idea not to present? Was it your idea not to present?" And finally -- her transformation into Darth Markus complete -- she says, "The answer to your question is yes." Actually, I think the answer is closer to "Killer Fatigue," because I'm not ready to believe that Marshawn has been so FUTR this whole time with nothing to back it up. The one or two things she says each episode are completely on track -- she just says them to us, rather than the team. Maybe she's just tired.

Bill feels that Marshawn abandoned her team, but she feels differently: "I didn't abandon my team! I was more than happy to do it!" Carolyn, in that put-upon rock-bottom-line-it-for-me way she has: "Marshawn, we've been talking about this I don't know how long, and I still don't know why…" Marshawn -- who, by the way, is cool as a cucumber this entire time, except for the interrupting, which makes it all the eerier -- replies, "For a very basic reason, Carolyn." Carolyn shakes her pretty hair. "Please tell me that reason. I'm trying to figure it out." Marshawn, you see, believed that Brian should be the one to present, again, all of a sudden. Trump laughs this off, again, and dares her to say that maybe Rebecca, but certainly not Brian, would do a better job than Marshawn, because that he could believe. Fuckin' ouch, dude. Marshawn is like, "She wouldn't." And because this is less like a meeting and more like bear-baiting all of a sudden, Brian says into the quiet, "She did a phenomenal job." Like Rebecca needs the help right now, kid. Marshawn smiles. "She did a nice job. It was fine." Hoo-hoo-HOO.

Bill still doesn't get it, because why would you take a risk on such a huge task. Marshawn scoffs that it was "a task about a display," and instead of explaining to her that all males 14-25 spend money or any amount of thought whatsoever on is violent video games, Trump just hollers something like, "This was gold on a platter delivered to your door! It's Star Wars for crying out loud! What's better than that?" He hates the fact -- "say what you want" -- that she shunned her responsibility. As for Brian, Trump thinks he's a terrible leader, his inexcusable tardiness cost them the task, and that he was late for idiotic reasons: "You live in Manhattan! And you didn' with the executives! And you didn't really know what they wanted! Brian, you're fired."

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