Apprentice
Summer Of Sam's

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A | Grade It Now!
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Lesson One: Competence Is Only Skin Deep

Trump asks if Lenny would be "disappointed" if he fired Summer, and the answer is: Wait, who exactly? Anybody but Tarek? Yes. "She's a strong woman, she's practical." George jumps Tarek from the other angle. "Tarek, why didn't you give something away, food or something? [Food is like 90% of George's appreciation in any given task, because he is adorable.] You had a budget." Tarek mentions the ironically-named "gift bags," and Lenny laughs. "Without gifts!" Tarek says it was a good call, the "gift" bags, and Trump's like, "Giving away...nothing?" Lee and Lenny laugh openly at him. "These people are laughing at you! I'm about to laugh myself!" There's a whole "You're from the Valley and I'm from Reseda" happening here, inside Tarek's weird little overcompensating mind, and he's about to wig about Nobody Laughs At The Tarek, but Summer stupidly interrupts. "You know what? Let me just say something real quick." Trump's like, "Answer Key: A? Remember? Why are you interrupting me when I'm knocking hell out of him? When I'm knocking him? What are you doing to yourself?" Her brain is just completely gone, I think. "I'm being truthful, and I'll always be truthful."

Trump, like, doesn't even know what that word even means, dude, so he gets to the point. "How stupid is that?" Lenny gets a little Brent around the edges: "It's stupid." Trump, getting laughs, goes into his cruel uncle routine where he can't shut up. "I'm about to fire this guy for being a horrible leader, and you keep interrupting me and stopping me from doing it." She interrupts every three words throughout that sentence, going on and on about something having to do with Tarek getting fired "in the truth." Send her ass home, dude. "You know what, Summer? You're fired." I said this in unison with Trump. Which is scarier than anything I've seen on this show, second to the whole Clay and Adam Sexapalooza Boardroom of Horror.

It's nice, because he's right, but also, she's dumb on a whole other level she clearly doesn't get, because: you're gonna disrespect the Trump? Lee and Lenny are now scared shitless, because he's off on a crazy thing, but he just tosses them out. They stand and file to the door, and things get crazy good as Trump calls after Tarek, "You didn't make it by much! She saved your ass with her own stupidity!" He nods, calmly agreeing: "Understood," which is the coolest thing he's done the whole episode. Lenny turns back around in the doorway, facing Tarek with dead, Dolph Lundgren "I vill break you" eyes. "Not for long." It is amazing and intense and very much makes me excited about the season.

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Apprentice

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