Over at Mosaic, Wes is directing the photo shoot, using plain old models rather than authentic Mosaic asses. Don't miss the shot of the naked girl changing her shirt in the background; I'm sure they're not missing it. Unfortunately, as Wes explains, he has no idea what he's doing. And that leaves him wide open to the arrival of Maria, who swings into the room like she owns it and starts giving orders. "I need for her bra not to show," Maria says with disgust at one point. Someone says they thought that looked kind of okay, but Maria insists it's "distracting." In an interview, Maria complains that no one was taking charge of the situation, so...guess what? She did. Wes deadpans in an interview, "When Maria flew into the studio on her broomstick, the whole attitude of the room changed." Hee. As Andy tries not to laugh at Maria's antics and...um, flight...Wes voices over that Maria thought nobody else was competent to run the show. Maria tells the photographer that they're going to do "bitchy." And she's running her hand over her own hair with her hand on her hip, kind of demonstrating. As the models pose, Maria tells them, "Bitchy, bitchy, bitchy, though." I'm not sure "bitchy" is a really helpful instruction for models, although not being one, I can't speak to it with any confidence. She then instructs them to employ as much "butt attitude" as possible. Whatever "butt attitude" is. Again, maybe that makes sense to models. Andy laughs, as does a guy I think is one of the production guys on the photo shoot. Maria insists in an interview that she understood the importance of good butt shots. Butt shots! Butt shots! Let's say it some more!
Andy and Sandy, meanwhile, are coaxing Maria to move things along, because they still have some jeans to get through, and they've only really got time for about five or seven shots per setup. Andy continues to try to step in, and Maria says -- in a voice reserved for teachers, snotty aunts, and beauty pageant contestant chaperones -- "Andy, please." He persists, moving on to Wes and saying that Wes, as the PM, really needs to do something. This is very mysterious to me, the way Wes clearly can't stand Maria, but is very hands-off in the way he approaches her. It's weirdly prickly in a way I don't totally get. In an interview, Andy says -- entirely correctly -- that a big part of a short task like this is time management, and they can't stand around taking fifty shots of every setup if they're going to finish on time. He reiterates that he told Wes over and over again that he needed to get a handle on the situation with Maria. "Otherwise," he quotes himself as saying to Wes, "she'll never respect you and she'll walk all over you."









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