Apprentice
Apprentice

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A- | 623 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Bitchy, death...it's not an easy choice

Wes steps over at last and tells Maria that they need to move along. "I understand; I understand," she says. "Do not get in my freakin' face." He tries to continue to talk to her, and she points her finger about an inch from his face and says, "I understand. Back off." And I have to say that I...don't understand. If he's so scared of her that he's afraid of approaching her, how does she feel comfortable enough with him to point in his face like that? I can't figure out their dynamic at all. Anyway, Sandy tells us that she thought Wes didn't do enough to contain Maria. "I would have been like, 'You, outside,'" she says. Heh. I'm kind of sorry that didn't happen. Because, hey, one of them would wind up with a black eye, and that's a no-lose situation if ever there was one. Sandy correctly points out that Wes needed to put his foot down and tell her that he was the PM, and if he said to hurry up, she had to hurry up.

Maria, helped by the editors who clearly love her (heh) in her quest for infamy, is seen trying to explain what she wants by saying, "Give me bitchy or give me death." The fact that the business world contains people who say things like that is the main reason why I have never been remotely tempted to enter it.

We return to find Mosaic in a meeting, with the giant Yellowfin Graphics logo in the back, in case you missed their early product placement. Maria is in that dumb-ass shiny jacket again, and she explains that she spoke to the graphic designers about the layout. My favorite part of this entire episode is how Andy is hanging back the whole time, laughing at Maria. It makes me giggle every single time. Maria lectures the rest of the team that she needs "time by ourselves" with the designer. Wes, Sandy, and Andy leave Maria alone with the designer, as Wes tries to calm Sandy, who is annoyed as all hell with being dismissed by someone as dumb as Maria. And I don't blame her a bit. Sandy can't understand how Maria can object to having other people at least present while she works. Maria is losing her marbles.

A bit later, Maria brings the work in to show it to Sandy, and she cannot understand how Sandy doesn't think that having Maria ferry the product back and forth and give them all a chance to consult isn't just as good as all of them working on it together. Unbelieeevable. Boyfriend Bill wanders by and sees Maria and Sandy yelling at each other. Oh, and Andy. Trying not to laugh. But as amused as he is, Andy also has a perfect bead on what went wrong. "This fight never would have occurred if Wes, in the beginning, had not been afraid to say no to Maria when she needed it." He goes on to say that furthermore, even if there's a fight, it should last 30 seconds, not the 20 minutes that it actually did. We watch as Sandy tells Maria that she has a track record of being really bossy, owning everything, and not being willing to delegate. Maria makes an exaggerated "What are you talking about?" face. "You want to be totally accountable for the win, but not for the loss," Sandy says, and she is so spot-on that it almost makes Maria's head fall off. But in an interview, Maria assures us that it's just that Sandy is unprofessional. Heh. "It angers me to be called a control freak, because I'm just quite simply not," she says. Blink-blink-blink-blink-blink. Hee. That was one of the funniest contestant interview moments I've ever seen.

Apprentice

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