Apprentice

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The Croc And The Rat

So you've probably heard the news that thanks to the success of this season, there's gong to be a second Celebrity Apprentice next year. Which kind of vindicates me. Some time in December, I told my wife Trash, "You know, people might actually watch this season." And she said, "What!?" And I said, "You know, between the celebrities and the writers strike, people might actually tune back in." And she said, "Oh, I thought you were saying you were going to watch it." And I said, "Oh, God no." And now here I am. So maybe "vindicates" isn't the right word.

All of which is just my way of stalling before getting into this, because we've got two hours of this tonight, people. We're getting struck, all right -- upside the head.

In the suite, everyone is hoping that Carol Alt is the one getting fired and not Jennie Finch. Omarosa has personal reasons for that, whatever they might be. "Business is always personal," she Michael Scotts. But when Carol and Marilu Henner return to the suite without Jennie, Omarosa gets over her disappointment in a hurry, and even gives Carol a big fake hug. "Everybody has to go sometime," she interviews. "As long as it's not me, oh well." I feel the same way, except instead of "oh well," I would have said, "I will be miserable."

After the credits (which still contains the epigram that totally contradicts what Omarosa just said), we watch Vincent Pastore meeting his ex-wife to give the donation he won as the PM last week. She's thrilled to get the 50 grand in her late husband's name. I don't think she's back together with Vinnie, though.

On a rainy morning, the Apprenti meet in a closed Macy's store with Trump, the Trumplets, and a couple of nondescript client executive types. Trump says that Tito Ortiz is sitting out this task because he's at a fight, so the teams will be roughly even at 5-4. Trump nominates Carol as Empresario's PM for this week, and Hydra picks Piers Morgan as their PM. So now that that's out of the way, Trump's ready to explain the task. He tells us about the non-shoes called Crocs. You probably already know about them, and you probably already have a strong opinion about them one way or another, and I'm not about to wade into the controversy. Trump also introduces the two guys from Crocs, who explain that they're going to be recycling used, donated Crocs for people in need. All the teams need to do is create in-store receptacles for people to drop them off. And yes, I know I wasn't going to stake out a position, but you've got to be in pretty dire need to want to wear recycled Crocs.

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Apprentice

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