They come off the elevator in suits and ties and sit down in the BR, quite nervous, even though it seems obvious what's going on. "Generally speaking," says Trump, "The Boardroom is not a place that you wanna be. Tonight, it's a little bit different... You are the final two." Sean blinks as he congratulates them on the achievement.
I would like to say some words to you and you say whatever comes to mind. Bill Rancic. Kendra. Rebecca Jarvis. Kwame. Troy. Randall. Feels good, huh?
Allie and Roxanne turned out, Trump explains, to be very disloyal. He doesn't go into the horrifying details about how they defended themselves and advanced valid lines of reasoning and defense and acted like adults, because it was just too ugly to bring up. "I didn't. Like. Seeing. What I saw." He tells them to go back to the suite and "look at the candidates that've been fired," and tells them that tomorrow they're going to be "fighting like [they've] never fought before." Hope they're not women! Because they are the kings of all ass-kissing, they thank him like literally billions of times as he nonverbally pleads with them to get the hell out of the Boardroom. Lee snurfles about how he's "up for the challenge, Mr. Trump," and Trump's like: "Just get out of here!" Sean claps him on the back like he's so cute and not sickening like that actually was, and Trump makes a weird, proud face and yells, "Freaking politician, Lee!" Thanks for being in the box I made up! It makes me feel smarter and more powerful! Please confirm my erroneous beliefs and snap judgments more often, and you could be the next Apprentice!
Sean interviews that it's "the most important day of my entire life," which I can buy, and then his awkward body prances back to the suite. Where they all are, including Allie and Roxanne, who drove away in a cab with their integrity mere minutes ago. There's Brent, and Tammy, and Leslie and Bryce, and there are hugs all over, and Dan looks crazy hot. Sean pantses around about how nice it is to see Tammy, and then picks her up off the floor and tries to spin her around, but whatever. From within his creepy bearhug, she's like, "So you're...doing well?" God save us from the imaginary crushes of a broken man-child. He kisses her cheek. Meanwhile, Lenny tells Lee how much he loves Lee, and Lee rolls over for a belly rub. God save us from the imaginary crushes of a broken man-child. I'm not the one drawing the parallel. The people they love are their doom. Lee interviews something about how "prestigious" it is to be in the Final Two, which is both sad and funny. Charmaine is only onscreen long enough to make a mean face. Hi, Charmaine! Everybody is so fucking drunk. Tammy can't even keep her eyes open through this whole part.