Apprentice
The Games People Play (1)

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Miss Alli: B | Grade It Now!
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Interview to a kill

Kendra and Tana both respond with a gasp of affection at seeing a picture of Bren -- which is indeed a nice picture that makes him look less sleazy than he looked by the time he left. They look upon Alex. "He's just so handsome," Kendra says. "He is a handsome man," Tana agrees. "I hope he is a friend for life," Kendra offers, not having yet heard about whether she's either a moron or the mascot of a moron. And then, a huge smile on Craig's face, and of course, they get all excited about that, because if there's one thing these two women care about deeply, it's whether or not you're smiling. "I hate that we fought," Kendra says, "because I do really think that he's a great guy." A butthole, but a great guy. Kendra interviews that they've met "amazing and crazy and colorful people," about whom, in most cases, they could think of nothing interesting to say other than that they were or weren't good-looking and did or didn't smile a lot. Bonded! For life! With everyone!

They close the book. "Each one of them, I kind of hold dear to my heart, whether I like them or not," Kendra says. And also, "[Mooooo.]" "Which one of us beautiful broads gets the job?" Tana asks as she and Kendra share a toast. Clink! Feh.

The next day, Kendra and Tana play Dueling Mascara Wands as they prepare for the Boardroom. Trump exits...somewhere, and he gets into his limo. Kendra and Tana leave the L-Pal. Ding! They are in the lobby. Okay, what in the holy hell is Tana wearing? Tana is wearing...Tana is wearing a jacket with dyed red fur lapels. I swear to God, I am not lying. She looks like the chaperone at a hookers' field trip. I prefer to think that Carolyn's slightly bemused expression relates to this choice in some way. Tana and Kendra turn in surprise as Trump appears on the big TV down at the end of the Boardroom table. He tells them that he's in his car on the way to his plane. Hot shot! He reviews the whole stupid college/not dynamic that nobody cared about to begin with, and then says that now, there are just two of them left. For the final task, Kendra will run the Best Buy Videogame World Championships. So she may actually meet the most well-rounded guy at the comic book convention! Hott! The tournament will be "yooge," and will take place at Webster Hall. Tana will run NYC2012's Athlete Challenge, a sports exhibition at Chelsea Piers to promote New York City's Olympic bid. They'll use all their skills and so forth, and we'll see who does the best job. The winner will be the apprentice! The loser will amount to nothing!

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Apprentice

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