New York porn. Boardroom. Time for the results. The teams file in, led by Jenn M. in a cream-colored pantsuit that not a lot of people could pull off, but that looks pretty good on her. Trump enters, wearing the Purple Tie of Results rather than the Pink Tie of Practically Everything Else. Eventually, he's just going to start dressing like The Joker, which I think will be awesome. Trump recaps the task requirements, and Boyfriend Bill announces Apex's results. Their reviews cited the "creative pan-Asian cooking" (not the team's accomplishment), but panned the "stark modern setting," the "uncomfortable chairs and tables," "slow, uneasy service from beginner staff," and -- most painfully -- "too many women in black milling around like a bunch of uptight stewardesses." I'm not sure what milling around in black has to do with stewardesses, but in any event, the hovering Black Dress Brigade doesn't seem to have made a very good impression. Maria's eyes at this moment? Are huge. Hee. Still, the reviews praise the "delightful newcomer" and give it "an A for effort." Ouch. "A for effort" generally means "F for Fucking Sucks." Their food score was 22, décor score was 16, and service score was 19. The total is 57.
Carolyn has the Mosaic reviews. They're "off to a good start," and can thank the "delicious contemporary American food," the "creative, stylish décor," and not so much the "itchy, fur-covered chairs." Heh. This makes Andy guffaw. There is also praise for the "hot, eye-candy waiters." Chris makes a "Thanks, gay guys!" face. Fans of the place say that the Mosaic restaurant is potentially a "star restaurant." Food score is 22, décor is 18, and service is 21. Mosaic has a total of 61, and the victory. And one thing I really liked is that the team immediately starts to congratulate Raj. In victory, they're willing to give the back-patting to the PM, and that's nice. Jenn C. sort of rolls her eyes, and Stacy looks at the boys enviously. Trump congratulates the team, and Raj says that they're "now moving up to higher-octane fuel." Trump turns back to Apex and asks them how they feel about it, and Jenn C. pronounces herself "very surprised." She says it was "the tightest [their] team has ever been," and she's "shocked." Trump next informs Mosaic that as their reward for the victory, they'll be going to meet "one of the greatest leaders in the country, Rudy Giuliani." Eh. Trump promises that Rudy will talk to them about leadership. And, undoubtedly, why they should pull that lever and vote Republican in the fall. Apex, Trump will see back in the Boardroom.