Apprentice
The Razor's Edge

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: B+ | Grade It Now!
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"You Are Chaos And Disorganization!"

Night. The part of Gold Rush that didn't feel like doing the actual task is sitting around upstairs, still brainstorming about variations on the theme and what they're going to do, immediately after the task starts, which it already has. Tarek, punchy, is like, "Get yourself closer...wanna rub cheeks?" and Dan, also punchy, comes out with the pretty hilarious "You don't wanna rub cheeks with these people. That's potentially disastrous." I love Dan. Charmaine calls up to Lee asking if the rest of the team is going to be joining them for, you know, the actual task, and Lee just starts naming off clubs and places where there are people, and their street addresses. Which literally could not be less helpful. Lenny finally walkies, "Cut the bullshit, we need you here." Lee stares into space. Theresa, with Lenny, is disgusted by all nothing that's currently happening. "Tell him we're meeting them," he says, but Lenny continues to shout into the walkie, kind of too taken with this "I am Lenny, I cut through the bullshit" idea he's got about himself to really be very helpful, because it just gets repetitive and weird as he screams again and again that Lee and the boys need to shut up and come to them immediately. Leslie eventually tells him to cut it out because the batteries are running out and he's not saying anything, but Lenny continues to scream into the walkie. Leslie interviews that "We're not going to get the most texts going back to the suite, or driving around town. We get the most texts by getting out there and making people text in." Which is the smartest thing anybody's said in a while. Lenny screams louder and louder at Lee, then abruptly hangs up. Heartbreakingly, Lee stares at the phone, shakes it, getting more and more weirded out: "Hello? Hello? Hello? ...Hello?"

Morning. Gold Rush leaves at like 6:30 AM (it's a Sunday, by the way; the time and date cues here are usually so fastidiously lacking that it's always confusing to me, especially when they do these population density tasks), looking very attractive in their matching white sweatshirts. Roxanne sweetly goes from room to room, gently waking up her team. Pepi thanks her, Stacy looks insane and cute when she wakes up, and everybody else, it would seem, Roxanne scares the shit out of. It's a fun little set of jumps from room to room. Roxanne interviews that Pepi is completely out of control of the team, and we cut to him and Sean eating cereal leisurely in the kitchen, as the minutes tick by. Stacy is in charge of location, being that she's from New York, and she tells us her plan is to put them "in the area with highest foot traffic per hour," which seems like a bad idea in many ways, because doesn't "foot traffic" connote people with something to do? It's been an hour since the other team left, Roxanne tells Synergy, but they don't seem to grasp how this fact is killing her inside, or how there's got to be a reason that Gold Rush left so early.

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Apprentice

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