The Writing On The Wall

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B- | Grade It Now!
Wall of confusion

Net Worth wall. Tara declares that the tag on the wall should be "Tear It Up." Craig relays the information to Ernie. And speaking of tearing it up, and by "it" I mean "your contract with the devil that allowed you to build all those casinos," Donald Trump is now arriving in his limo to check on the teams. And what music are they using? Well, they're using Trump-centric hip-hop, a genre I bet you didn't even know existed. "Trump in the stretch, come to see what's next, Trump's rollin' up, Trump's rollin' up." No, seriously. I am not lying. And then there's something about "DT," and yes, this is really apparently some kind of...I don't know. Never mind. I'm about to make a dork out of myself even more than usual, so let's just pretend I said something knowing and cutting about the deployment of that song in this sequence. Anyway, Tara talks about what a surprise it was to see Donald show up in his limo and everything. She's lucky she can't hear the song. Trump takes a peek at their ad and pronounces it "very nice, beautiful." They introduce Trump to Ernie, and then Trump is taking off again. Tara interviews that she wishes Trump had said "excellent." You just can't please some people.

Over at Magna, we look at the Big Fist. And Trump's rollin' up here, too. Only at Magna, Trump merely does a drive-by, and continues rollin'. He lowers the window and looks out. "That's interesting," he says dismissively as he puts up the window and drives off. Ouch. Alex is sad, and interviews that being dissed by Trump made him feel like Trump thought Magna was "a bunch of losers." And then Alex unleashes this gem from the self-esteem playbook: "I wanted to show Mr. Trump that if he thought we were losers, that he was mistaken!" Wow. Strong statement! Stick to your guns, little man! Oh, and Alex adds "amusingly" that then, he said some prayers. Which you know he did, because it's freedom of religion, not freedom from religion. He just learned that one.

Finally, it is time for Net Worth to welcome Glasses and No-Glasses for the judging. Tara shakes hands with them. They ask for a little bit of an explanation of what they're looking at. In case you didn't get a good look at the ad, it basically has a red car and a yellow car busting through some kind of gray paper barrier. And indeed, just as Tara (so literally) explained, behind the barrier are a bunch of frowning buildings making mean faces, and in front of the barrier are happy brownstones. Neither of which, apparently, is a feature faithful to the game. No anthropomorphized buildings in the game. Anyway, there is a little green box that says "PS2," and the words "Gran Turismo 4" are, of course, at the top. Oh, and the random "Tear it up." Now, there is a slight defense of "tear it up" to be made, in that the cars are being drawn as if they're busting through a wall of paper, so there are what look like torn edges in the ad, making the choice of that expression slightly less random. But as Tara explains this whole concept, everything she says is an "I" statement. "I did this," "I wanted it to say that." As Chris interviews, it appeared that she was determined to allow no credit to go to anyone else. That will not make her popular, despite the fact that I'm not sure anyone else is really clamoring for ownership of this concept. Chris adds that he thinks Tara cared more about "having an incredible art piece" than about telling people to buy the game. Which...I think is exactly right.

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