Apprentice
Apprentice

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: B+ | 697 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Lesson Two: Leave It On The Playground

1. Discuss what you would do if all three of these people entered your boardroom for possible termination. Who would you fire? Explain your reasoning. How else would you use this opportunity? Use specific examples of backhanded insults and power-brokering you'd utilize to take them all down a peg.
2. What if only two of these candidates came into the boardroom? Which two would you hope and pray they might be? What would you do if the Project Manager screwed himself over for no clear reason? Special attention should be paid to referencing Colby from Survivor, any past boneheaded Apprentices that have done crap like this, or those irritating people on reality shows that say they want to go home to save a fellow contestant, but are totally lying and chicken out.
3. Throw up your hands and come up with a tired and played-out Omarosa joke, and call it a day.
4. Make a case that it should have been the other team in trouble, entirely because of that embarrassing and awkward drill team routine they did.
5. Make a case that Markus should have been fired at the beginning of the episode when he sold everybody down the river for no reason other than his congenital need to kiss as much ass as possible in every situation. You can enrich your word power by using the following vocabulary terms: "choad," "hapless," "assclown," "martyriffic," or "bitchslap."

I start getting mad at Chris because I like him, I think he's smart and good-looking and a good leader and a worthy player of this game, and Markus is the opposite of those things, and Chris has just insured that Markus will be here next week. Markus had this whole thing on his website, like, as of yesterday, that was just episode-by-episode, point-by-point bitching incoherently about how wrongfully he was treated, portrayed, made a joke of, senselessly maligned -- it makes no sense and goes on and on and anyway it's gone now, so I can't quote him liberally here, like I wanted to. You know I love rambling, tangential, stream-of-consciousness stuff like that, right? I just wish I'd copy-pasted it like I thought I should. Stupid Markus. That's so Markus, to put up a ranting, whiny website and then have to take it down on Trump's orders. Like, why can't anybody ever give him a break or whatever. Argh.

Apprentice

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