Apprentice
To Bee Or Not To Bee

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Jacob Clifton: B- | Grade It Now!
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Lesson Five: Speak Up. Or: Don't, Depending

The first guy tells them to leave or he's going to shoot them in their stupid faces, but admits that if her makeup had been fresher, he would have totally bought honey for his gas station. The second guy begs them to leave because he's not empowered to make those decisions, and the third place -- a bakery, which actually does make sense -- tells them no way. Tim raises Aaron on the walkie and tells him that they're striking out. Meaning that of everyone, Tim and Nicole took a vacation to Stupidland and contributed nothing. Remember last week when the bulk sales trip was a "gamble" and Aaron was scared to death that giving up manpower on a sales task was a bad idea? Are these people's attention spans that short? Really?

Back at the Arrow Ralph's, Aaron wanders around in a very Aimee way, and finally Stefani just hands him a tray of fruit and honey samples and tells him to go sell some honey and stop gawping: "You've got the face for it." I wish I knew why Aaron and Aimee are so egregiously useless this week? I know it's not editing, because both in real time and in the interviews they're blowing everybody's minds. It's like they're being poisoned or something, I swear. Mercury in their food, or something. They're just completely out of it. And if you told me that was going on, I'd name Aaron as the first suspect, but he's one of the victims, so who knows what's going on. I'd say low-level anaphylactic shock from the bees, except I don't think Aaron went to the apiary and I know Aimee didn't, because she was too busy already acting like this at that time. And also: duh. Aaron's got the face for ANYTHING. I would buy ANYTHING from that face. Get your ass on the floor and start selling.

Aaron whines about how he hates sales, and Stefani's like, "You are IN sales," and he says that's why he's bitching: "I do it every day!" Cobra, right then. The fuck you say? Stefani interviews that basically she had to manage Aaron. "What was he doing? I don't know..." Elsewhere, Sean is grilling the normally vociferous James about Aaron's "management style," and James tries to figure out how to say "hang loose, dude" in a way that flatters Aaron. It's incredibly awkward when he says "...laid...back?" and Sean looks at him like an insect. Hilarious act-out on Aaron, standing in front of an empty table, staring into space, shuffling first one direction and then the other, and then wandering abruptly in a different direction. It's like when you're watching local news and they cut to a field anchor or the weatherman and he doesn't know it. Only the empty green-screen with nothing on it is Aaron's mind.

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Apprentice

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