To Lead Or Not To Lead

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: B+ | Grade It Now!
Lesson Eleven: Be Bold, And Mighty Forces Will Come To Your Aid

Felisha and Alla walk out of the building together, and Felisha looks really pretty. Upstairs, there's a slow-motion shot of Trump heading toward the suite, and it's just as hilarious the fifteenth time as it was the first. He opens the door and Rebecca and Randal are standing at attention just inside, like at the beginning of the episode, when Alla thought her bonfires could save her.

Crazy Taxi: Felisha admits that she just didn't perform, didn't give the best she had to offer, and that this sucks, because it was her last task, which means that nobody will have a good memory about it, not even her. Alla then goes crazy nuts some more, losing a fair amount of what respect and goodwill I'd been able to retain for her through the Boardroom: "Mr. Trump didn't say that I am a terrible leader. He just said that there are very few people out there than can lead me. People have said I'm difficult -- or challenging -- to lead. Maybe they are weak themselves. I can be led by the right leader, that's all I can say." Shades of Marshawn and Brian, no? Felisha rolls her eyes affectionately. The end. I love that it ended on that, on something beautiful and funny after all that awkward ugliness.

Lessons learned: If you're entering a leadership competition, try to make sure that you don't have a violent phobia of leadership first. That can fuck things up for you. If you're going to be the boss, actually be the boss -- people can smell that on you so fast, and they won't hesitate to eat you alive, so don't stick your neck out unless you can trust yourself. It's an authenticity question, not a propaganda one, so if you feel like you're not standing on solid ground, take a second and figure it out. Trust nobody, especially if you're planning on trusting somebody whom you've watched destroy every other person in her path. That's just dumb.

Drink lots of water, because it's good for your skin and keeps you from losing it when you're working too hard. Whatever it is, Microsoft has a plan for it, and that plan is full of bugs and secret trapdoors and evil. Kindness costs nothing and has many dividends. Trump has something like a heart. Carolyn has something like something like a heart. Bill has something like something to prove. Either show or tell, but don't try to show by telling or tell by showing, because people will always project their confusion onto you, and think you're a moron. Just get it across and know your audience. Anybody can be an actor, so don't sweat it, but also, anybody can be an actor, so don't take people at face value.

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