Apprentice
Toying With Disaster

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Welcome back, suck-ups

Andy then gives a stupid interview in which he claims that blame can't be placed on any of the men. Including, apparently, him, despite the fact that it was his idea. He thinks the problem was Pamela, obviously. "No man at any time knew what they were supposed to do." It's interesting, because the Extra! Boardroom! Footage! showed that one of Pamela's complaints about Andy was that he needed to be constantly told what to do and was incapable of handling anything on his own without constantly asking for the next step, so I guess it's all in your perception, eh? "The blame here lies with our project manager," he says. Now I ask you: Did any of them not know what they were supposed to be doing when they were throwing out ideas? Because that's where they went off track. Not execution. They just didn't come up with a good idea, and that ain't on her, as unsure as I am that I'm going to be able to stand her for very long.

A bunch of the guys sit around and speculate about who Pamela will bring to the Boardroom. Chris and Rob both think they might go, and they both suspect that Andy might, as well. Rob also talks about how he spent half the day with his thumb up his ass, so it seems like he does understand what happened, he just doesn't understand who's going to take the blame for it. He interviews that Pamela is going to ask the question, "What did Rob do?" and that his reaction will be, "What did you tell me to do?" Oh, no. No, no. That could not be a more incorrect answer. A guy like Trump does not believe that in order to contribute, you should need to be given direct orders. How can he not know that? Ay yi yi. Even I know that. Kelly and Kevin talk about how it's "like getting ready for a game." Because boys love sports metaphors. Meanwhile, Pamela applies mascara. Because girls love makeup. Andy lectures us that Pamela sees him as a target "because [he's] young." And not, I guess, because his idea sucked ass. He goes on to say that Pamela doesn't know that his claim to fame is as a "nationally ranked debater." Ooooh, impressive! Not. I have no idea why he thinks that debate would necessarily prepare him for this. In a debate, you're not talking about yourself, and you don't have to sell yourself. It's really a pretty markedly different skill set. ["And the 'skill' is…remaining a virgin. I'm sorry, but it's true. Cram it, Crimson." -- Sars] "I will take her out," he says confidently. Because he's ripped up all the chicks he's faced so far...in his vast 22 years of experience. I have to say, as irritating as he is, Andy is the kind of person I am happy to go up against anytime, because he will always underestimate me, and I will always kick his ass as a result.

Sunset. Chanting music. It's time to return to the Boardroom. Mosaic enters, dragging their bags behind them. They walk into the Boardroom, where Carolyn and George await. When they're all seated, Trump walks in. "Okay," he says. "Tell me. Were you impressed with Mattel?" Pamela says that she wasn't sure that Mattel was on board with the information that the candidates had actually been given. Carolyn asks if Pamela means that Mattel handled it badly and she handled it correctly. Pamela's not saying that. She's saying the team were just throwing out ideas, and they don't understand much about toys. Carolyn comes back with her opinion that Pamela didn't understand the children, and notes that she didn't appreciate Pamela making fun of the kids in the focus group. When she brings up the haircut comment, Pamela goes over Carolyn's head by ignoring her and turning to Donald to tell him that the one kid had a really bad haircut, which is stupid for two reasons. First of all, it's totally insulting to Carolyn to completely take your eyes and attention off of her while she's talking to you. Second of all, as Trump immediately points out, he has bad hair himself. Pamela bungles her comic timing by feeling obligated to repeat her Dumb and Dumber line under her breath, but she acknowledges, "I should have kept that to myself." Carolyn asks her if she thinks she can relate to children if she talks like that, and Pamela says that frankly, she doesn't relate to children and doesn't have any.

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Apprentice

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