Apprentice
Whopper 101

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B | 1 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Have it your way or the highway

And then...the Uggs. Oh, Erin's Uggs. She's wearing a green minidress that is already very, very disturbing, and she's got it paired with brown Uggs as she flops face-first onto the foot of the bed where Todd is hanging out. She tells him she doesn't want to "harm" anyone on the team. He sympathizes with her desire to be positive. He does not share it, though. She interviews that "emotions are running so high." After, you know, the three days in which they've all bonded. And...and...then there's this interview, where Erin is wearing a...pink blanket? Bath mat? Horse cozy? I have no idea. Whatever it is, it's very, very furry and unfortunate. Erin just doesn't want to participate in the hurting. No hurting! But the hurting is inevitable, so you might as well throw yourself into it. To wit, the team picks up its luggage and heads for the Boardroom, as the distinctive music plays.

Ding! They get off the elevator, and Robin sends them in to see the Viceroys and Trump. Once Trump is seated, he berates them again for losing to high-school people. Alex says he's embarrassed, irrespective of who beat them. They can try to keep that up, but Trump isn't going to hear it. He returns again to how he himself went to college, and now he thinks it might have been for nothing, based on...you know, a day at Burger King, because isn't that what your degree in philosophy is supposed to help you with? Todd says he didn't. Asked what his strategy was, Todd says he divided the team into restaurant on one side and marketing/promotion on the other. Trump asks about the cash register problem, known to higher mortals as "point of sale." George points out that the other team had three people trained on point of sale, but actually, according to Brian, they had four, I think. Four of the women. Isn't that right? Maybe I'll go back and check. Anyway, George says the whole team "should be ashamed" that they blew it at the cash register. Yeah, I kind of agree. A pretty stupid way to lose what's supposed to be a marketing task. Carolyn, asked about how the team did, says she thinks "the promotion was horrific." Hee. "I have never seen a worse promotion, ever." Snerk. I'm not sure I have either, actually. With the guitar and everything? Man. Yeah, that hurt. George says he couldn't tell from the promotion what they were selling, or what throwing the ball had to do with anything. He asks how people on the street were supposed to know what was going on. Danny insists that it doesn't matter, because he was only supposed to get people's attention. Carolyn points out that that's not really right -- he's supposed to be getting people to buy a particular item, not to just come in the door because he gets their attention or obstructs the sidewalk or scares the shit out of them or whatever the hell he was doing.

Todd, sensing an opening, says that "Danny's inability to make timely, effective decisions..." But Trump jumps in, wondering why Todd is blaming Danny when he himself was in charge. Todd stammers that he doesn't entirely blame Danny. Apropos of nothing, Trump then asks Todd what he thinks of how Danny dresses. Todd says that he thinks it's "stylish," but not effective, necessarily. Todd says that in a company like Trump's, it wouldn't fly. Danny jumps in to argue that "it's all about character," meaning that he has definitely never met Trump or anyone Trump works with. "You don't want clones!" Danny says dismissively in support of the way he dresses. Carolyn's face twists into a smile. "Hold it, hold it," George says. "Do you think I'm a clone?" Hee. You are no clone, George. You are the unique granddaddy of competitive business jackassery, in the best way. Trump makes George shut up. Trump asks Danny whether the way he dresses is "a disadvantage" in a corporate environment. Danny insists that he works with all kinds of big companies, and it doesn't matter how he dresses. He connects with them for marketing expertise and "branding" and stuff, whatever that means. "Branding" is really one of my least favorite terms. Unless I'm burning my initials into an obnoxious person's arm. Verna is asked whether Danny's at a disadvantage, and she hasn't yet seen him display the goods to overcome that disadvantage. Trump then asks Erin why she's not talking. He's heard she's a lawyer, and she likes suing men. She claims, of course, that she will sue anyone. That's always flattering. Erin says she loves, personally, how Danny dresses, but she doesn't indulge her personal wish to "wear head-to-toe pink" all the time (ew), so she's not sure he can be all Scruffy Guy and get away with it. Verna is the first to actually be asked whom she'd fire, and she chooses Danny. She didn't think the marketing was good enough. Asked whom he'd fire, Danny offers up Todd, saying that the problem was obviously the lack of training for people, not the marketing. And he has a point in the sense that even if he didn't send in enough people, it wouldn't have done much good to send in more people whom the restaurant couldn't accommodate anyway.

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Apprentice

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