Bachelor
After the Final Rose Pt. 2

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Good Golly, Miss Molly

Stephanie says it's better to do this now than be married for a year and have it not be working, and then some more nimrods are applauding. Are these people under the impression that everyone's mad just because it didn't work out between Jason and Melissa? Let me explain something to you pinheads: This is The Bachelor. We already know things aren't going to work out. They never work out. We know this because this show has to keep going back to the Trista/Ryan well, because the couples always split up. People are mad at Jason because a) he dumped Melissa on national television; and b) he goes from agonized face from dumping Molly to proposing to Melissa, and then goes from agonized face from dumping Melissa to making out with Molly, which means c) he's a big phoney.

Back from commercial. There are enough candles on set for almost any occult ceremony you could think of. Jason comes out to the cheers and applause of people who really need lives. Harrison asks what he thought the reaction would be. Jason says he doesn't know, because he admits it wasn't the "classiest" move ever. Of course, if he's ever seen one of these stupid After the Final Rose specials, he'd realize the audience isn't exactly crammed with cynical people who only watch the show for its train-wreck qualities.

Anyway, then we have to watch Jason dump Melissa again. Jason has the good grace to look chastened as he watches Melissa tear up when she says he took her chance to just be engaged just once.

"I'm not proud of what I did to her," says Jason. Well, how understated of you. He says he made the right choice for all of them though, because things were different, and he was in love with someone else. Again, he paints the decision as a choice between a) Humiliatingly dumping someone on national television, or b) going through with a loveless marriage. Idiot.

Harrison tells him some people are very upset and hurt. "Do you get that? And what do you say to them?" Jason: "Me me me me me me me me me." He still tries to pretend that he was honestly in love with Melissa. Except for the part of him that was broken up over dumping Molly, which grew and grew and grew, I suppose. However, while I can understand thinking Jason's a self-involved phoney, who, other than Melissa, is hurt? Anybody who feels "hurt" by what happened on this show needs to get outside every once in a while.

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Bachelor

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