And now the women are being flown in helicopters while Ben is walking up a hill, because I guess we're supposed to believe Ben is walking up the Matterhorn in his dress shoes. Meanwhile, everyone is talking about love and forever, and no one is talking about Valtrex treatments.

"Today I have to say goodbye to a woman that I'm in love with," says Ben, which isn't true, because if he's in love with both of them then he's in love with neither of them, which is something a show that purports to be about romance would know.

So: a helicopter lands, and it's Lindzi in the dreaded leadoff spot. Chris Harrison greets her and walks her to the edge of the clearing, where Ben is waiting. "This is the moment girls dream of their whole life," she tells us. Yeah, not yet it's not.

Jesus, it's some hike from where Chris Harrison abandoned her to where she joins Ben. She's actually out of breath! Not that that stops her from blathering on about how she's in love with him. Ben's out-of-proportion nervousness finally clues her in a little bit, judging by the way her smile fades, that she ain't leaving this mountain with a proposal. As Ben yammers on about the moments they've shared, she listens. "I want you to know that I've fallen in love with you, but I need those moments to last a lifetime, and I've found that with someone else. I'm sorry. I'm in love with someone else," he says

He tells her that it didn't come easy. Please, tell the woman getting dumped for Courtney how hard this is on you, Ben. He asks if he can walk her out. I really wish she'd tell him to stick it and walk out on her own, but it's not like this show's invested in the idea that a woman doesn't need a man, even a schlub like Ben.

Before they part, she talks about she's mad at herself, and then: "If things don't work out, call me," which is one of the worst doormatty things I've ever heard on this show.

The helicopter flies her away, and she keeps commendably composed in the helicopter, while Ben talks some more about how hard this was for him, and how he's not sure how this is going to end. I think I speak for everyone when I say at least ONE homicide would be nice.

And now Courtney arrives, not knowing if she's going to be the happiest, luckiest girl or shocked, heartbroken and dumbfounded. She says she and Ben have the potential to be amazing together, they just have to "get through this." The proposal? "I'm a good person, and good things happen to good people," Courtney tells us, which is good, because it's important to be conceited if you're going to make a relationship work.