Cult Of (No) Personality

Episode Report Card
Shack: C- | Grade It Now!
Grim, Scary Tales

Gwen and Aaron slow dance to the violin music. Aaron mutters that they're dancing like nobody's watching. Except you're not. Because you know people are watching. There are probably fifteen people on the crew in that room, watching you dance. Shut up. Aaron tells us that he's never met anybody that he feels so strongly about in this time frame before. Except Helene. And maybe Brooke. Not so much Brooke, but definitely Helene.

Commercials. When we return, Brooke, Hayley, Angela and Aaron are heading out to the marina for their yacht date. The name of the boat is Mojo, prompting Aaron to declare, "Get your mojo on!" Yes, you're very clever, Aaron.

They all head out to sea. They watch a sea lion frolic. They jump into the ocean. They hang out in a hot tub on the yacht, because sometimes a yacht just isn't decadent enough; you've got to have a hot tub to impress the really shallow babes. Neither Hayley nor Angela seems terribly afflicted with sea sickness. The waters are pretty calm. Angela tells us that she could see herself falling in love with Aaron "someday," because he's so funny and open. Funny? Open? They must be editing out those parts in order to make room for the women acting crazy. And shots of boobies. Angela says she is finding herself attracted to Aaron. On the boat, Angela says to Aaron, "You've made out with everybody you've gone out with. So how do you feel about that?" I'm assuming she means he's made out with everybody he's had a solo date with. Aaron's response: "We're talking about meeting people's families and stuff, you know. I mean, you've gotta go there, I guess." What? What? So kissing the women is just part of the process, then? He has to kiss them because he's going to meet their parents? Angela says that at least Aaron isn't like Alex from Season One, but I can't make out her reason why and they cut her off before there can be a discussion of that thorny issue. And also because Aaron becomes more like Alex with every episode. Aaron tells us that he's glad that Angela has started to "open up" and told him funny stories and blah blah blah. He's glad to learn more about her personality.

We cut to Hayley and Aaron hanging out together. Aaron says that he wishes Hayley would just "be herself" and not worry so much about "not being herself." How does he know she's not being herself? Hayley tells Aaron that she doesn't know why she's having a hard time with Aaron. She thinks perhaps she's afraid of making herself vulnerable and getting hurt. But Hayley, that's what this show is all about. Aaron asks, "Is that a risk worth taking?" Hayley responds, "Some risks are scarier than others. And when it involves the heart, it increases the scariness." I think that's a "no."

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